My Mouth Overloaded My ASS

Miss Tee-Tee

2011-12-09T01:00:00.000-08:00

Today was a rather “rough” day to say the least. Tee-Tee our sweet little angel of a doggie was put to sleep late this afternoon. It was ~~probably~~ the toughest decision we have ever made. Here are some interesting facts or some history on her.

~ She got her name, Tee-Tee because when we first got her she would get so excited, nervous, happy, worried, scared or whatever that she would tinkle (pee-pee) just a little bit wherever she was. It didn’t matter what the occasion was or what the situation was she would tinkle. The poor thing just couldn’t help herself. At the time my sister, Tina had young sons that she was potty training and she would ask them “Do ya have to go “tee-tee?” (Please note that this is said in a heavy southern drawl!). So it was just OBVIOUS to us that TEE-TEE had to be her name. It was so fitting for her, don’t ya’ll think?

~ We got her when she was about 2 yrs of age. She was not potty trained nor did she know how to play. She was a smart cookie that is for sure. She learned everything very quickly. She was potty trained very easily. She loved to play. She would even bring the toy and put it right in your hand, or if you didn’t want it in your hand she would put it right in front of your foot. Now how many dogs do that? She taught herself that little trick! She LOVED to play with her toys or balls. She would play constantly if we would let her. Her toys had to have squeakers in them, otherwise in her mind, they were broken! She enjoyed squeaking them herself!!

~When we got her we already had Chip, our cat. She knew that she had to get along with Chip in order to stay. He was the alpha male and she followed ~~the~~ his rules, just like a good little girl.

Chip &Tee-Tee

~She was so human like it was unbelievable. I have never seen another animal as human as she was. It amazes me. She would always look you straight in the eyes. She always understood what you were saying, it didn’t matter on your tone or not. She knew what you were saying. If she knew someone was upset, she would immediately go over to that person and get as close as she could to them and hug them. She was a great hugger, a good loving doggie. She genuinely understood what was going on and tried to do anything she could to help. I know that kind of sounds strange but it is true.

~She loved wearing necklaces and I mean necklaces not collars! When she was younger she liked dressing up but as she got older it was too difficult for her (arthritis & cysts). She loved bubble gum. If she saw me chewing gum she was stuck to me until I would give her a teeny tiny piece and then she was satisfied! If she didn’t want a type of food it was so obvious, and there was no way she was going to take it!

Tee-Tee wearing a scrunching - doesn't she look adorable?

Tee-Tee would get cold very easily and my cousins bib was perfect for her. Besides that I think he loved seeing her in it.(He was almost a year!)

~Towards the end when she became diabetic, I had to give her shots twice a day. She also had severe arthritis as well. So twice a day I would get her shot, arthritis meds and “treats” ready. In the morning it was kind of like a game. She would go running to mom while I was in the living room calling her to come and have her “treats”. She would be in the other room with mom peaking around the corner as if I couldn’t see her. It was so cute. Then she would finally come out to me, and act all surprised and get on the couch with me and she would cuddle up (hug me) next to me. After a few minutes I would give her, her insulin shot, then she would love me some more and then I would give her, what we call her “treats” but are really pills. She always just took them like they were candy. I know, huh! I always joked that she was my pill popping puppy!

~ And now, Tee-Tee was diabetic and it seemed to be getting worse. Her arthritis was getting worse as well. She has had what they were calling “fatty cysts” for quite some time, when in fact they were not. The other day one of them burst. Some of them were fatty cysts, but there were a few that were indeed, infected abscesses. So unfortunately, she had been misdiagnosed by 3 different doctors. I think that alone could have changed a lot of the way her illnesses turned out but I can’t put everything on that, if I do, I will be stuck on that forever.

~I wanted to share a bit about Tee-Tee with the world. She was truly my father’s ~~dog~~ daughter. We used to joke and say it was his favorite daughter. She never talked back; she always did what he wanted, etc!!

May you all spend extra time with your 4 legged loved ones. Make sure you give them plenty of hugs and kisses.

Wordless Wednesday ~ Piggy Style!

2011-12-07T01:31:00.000-08:00

*Birthday cake for Mom. Made by Sarah @ Dolci
She makes so many more things, all so pretty and all so very yummy in your tummy. Check her out!

It's too much to hope for...

2011-12-06T01:00:00.000-08:00

credit due

It’s too much to hope for a life without pain,
It’s wrong to expect a life without pain;
For pain is our body’s defense.
No matter how much we dislike it,
And nobody likes pain,
Pain is important.
And,
For pain we should be grateful!
How else would we know,
To move our hand from the fire?
Our finger from the blade?
Our foot from the thorn?
So pain is important.
And for pain we should be grateful!
Yet,
There’s a type of pain that serves no purpose,
That’s chronic pain,
It’s the elite brand of pain that’s not for defense.
It’s an attacking force.
An attacker from within,
A destroyer of personal happiness,
An aggressive assailant on personal ability.
A ceaseless invader of personal peace.
And,
A continuous harassment to life!
Chronic pain is the hardest hurdle for the mind to jump.
Sometimes it is almost impossible to jump,
Yet, we must keep trying.
And trying,
And trying.
Because if we don’t it will destroy.
And,
From this battle will come some good,
The satisfaction of overcoming pain.
The achievement of happiness and peace, of life in spite of it.
This is quite an achievement.
An achievement very special, very personal.
A feeling of strength,
Of inner strength;
Which has to be experienced to be understood.
So, we all have to accept pain,
Even sometimes destructive pain.
For it is part of the scheme of things,
And the mind can manage it,
And the mind will become stronger for the practice.

- Johnathan Wilson-Fuller (age 9 at time of writing)

MIA

2011-12-04T00:41:00.000-08:00

I started blogging in Mar 2009 and was so excited about starting and having a blog. Woo-hoo! I never thought I would go MIA for this long. My last entry was on May 25^th 2011. That seems like forever ago. Truthfully it all has to do with my illnesses and how well I am doing or not doing. My well being or lack thereof truly determines if I am going to be able to make an entry or not. And for the last couple of months my hands have been horrible. My right hand is the worst. Both my thumbs and my pointer finger on my right hand are at times almost unable to even use. I am told it is related to my Lupus. YUCK! Guess, I have another scary issue I have to look in the eyes. Wonder if it is ok, if my eyes are closed? Guess I gotta save up for that Dragon Dictation program. I have it on my iPhone (it was a free app) and I LOVE it. So we will see.

I miss blogging. I have actually been dreaming that I was back to blogging! I know, huh, kind of sad, ya think? I think!

I am hoping this short entry will get me back on the road to happiness . . . blogging.

See ya soon!!

Drugs, Drugs and more Drugs

2011-05-25T02:56:00.000-07:00

I think I have tried just about every drug out there for RA (rheumatoid Arthritis), Lupus and UCTD. It sure the hell seems like it anyway. They either don’t work or I am severely allergic to them. I thought it might be interesting to list all of the medications I have tried just in the last 3 years, or shall I say the ones I can remember. I had a list with all of them but they were on my old computer and I need to get a new hard drive and blah, blah, blah, you know how that story goes.

So here is the list:

· Methotroxate

· Cell Cept
· Enbrel

· Rituxan IV

· Remicade IV

· Orencia IV

· Imuran

· Indomethacin

· Azathioprine

· Mobic

· Meloxicam

· Humira IV

So after having tried all of these my rheumatologist wanted me to take a break and see if something else would be coming out soon that I would be able to try. So after few months, he suggested Actemra IV. Now normally if I am going to have bad reaction it will happen right there during the treatment. This time it didn’t. I felt fine, well you know exhausted but nothing major. My aches and pains went up a bit and so did my exhaustion, but that is totally understandable considering you are having all of these drugs poured into your system.

Well by Sunday I couldn’t breathe. My entire bodice area was so sore I couldn’t handle anything touching it. When I would breathe, if I took small breaths it wasn’t quite as painful as if I tried to take a full breath. I kept thinking it would get better or go away.

Monday I ended up seeing my PCP to see what was going on. After her examining me she told me she wanted me to go to E.R. and have some blood work done and a CT scan. She was worried about me having a PE (pulmonary embolism) or that my abdomen might have perforated. She called ahead to E.R. so that they would know why I was there and what needed to be done. Oh, the reason she sent me to E.R. was that by the time she was done seeing me it was after hours so basically nothing was open.

Note to self: that doesn’t mean a damn thing to them. I waited over 3 hrs to get to see the triage and then another 2 hours just to get inside to have a chance to see the E.R. doctor. I will tell you more about this later.

So I have tried numerous medications in just about all forms. I have had pills, IV’s, and have even had to give myself shots. For the most part these drugs did not work. If they did they did not last for long at giving me any relief. So then we would try something new. It does a get a bit discouraging and overwhelming and sometimes downright depressing once you realize all of the types of things you have tried to do, to get some relief. And I am just talking about the main drug here, I could probably right several more posts on different types of treatments, herbs, supplements, eating, etc that I have tried as well. When I ended up in the hospital I was wondering if this could be an allergic reaction to my latest drug that I had just tried…

Shaking

2011-05-21T15:22:00.000-07:00

Essential Tremors, Shakes, call them what you want, I have them and I hate them.
I can remember years ago when I was in grade school I had a friend and her father had the shakes. He was young and it was the first time I had come in contact with someone that had the shakes like that and was young. You know normally you would see someone in their 80’s or 90’s like that. Well, he certainly wasn’t. His family made fun of him and never tried to help him. It always bothered me. I can remember asking my friend what happened or what was wrong and she would laugh and say nothing he is always that way. It broke my heart. I can remember always feeling pity for him. I always felt sorry for him.
To this day when I see someone that has the shakes I still feel that same way, PITY. I feel so bad for them, I know most of them are much older and have lived full productive lives but still, having the shakes is difficult.

For several years now I have had the shakes. At first they kind of came and went. I could “hide” them. Then they seemed to start staying for longer periods of time. Now they are much more noticeable. Not only do they stay all of the time they are now very shaky. There is no way of hiding these shakes. In my mind I am not old. Yes, I am 39 (soon so soon to be 40) but like I mentioned before you never saw young people with shakes, not like this. Unless they were cold or nervous! I can’t tell you how many times someone has said to me “Oh honey it is nothing to be nervous about just take a deep breath and try and calm down.” Or “Oh my are you that cold?” Then I have to explain to them that I have shakes and blah blah blah…

Can you even imagine what it would be like to always be shaking? Try picking up a drink; now try it without spilling it. Try pouring something now without spilling it. Don’t even think about writing, or signing your name. You wanted to button that? Think again. There are many times that I want to do something but because of my shakes I am unable to. I have to put it off till later or another time in hopes that my shakes will simmer down just enough for me to do whatever it is that I wanted to do. I used to make homemade cards that have become almost impossible for me to do. The normal daily activities that we all do and take for granted are not so easily done when one shakes nonstop.

Sometimes typing is even next to impossible. When I first started this blog I thought this would be something that I could do on a semi-regular basis and keep things up… since the shaking has increased not so easily done if you know what I mean.
So here I am many years older from that grade school and I am now “cursed” with them. I always felt PITY for those that had the shakes because I could always imagine what it might be like to have them. I always felt sorry for those people. Funny how things turn out. Don’t you think?

Description of a Friend

2011-05-03T02:04:00.000-07:00

Friends.......They love you,

But they're not your lover

They care for you,

But they're not from your family

They're ready to share your pain,

But they're not your blood relation.

They are........FRIENDS!!!!!

A True friend......

Scolds like a DAD..

Cares like a MOM..

Teases like a SISTER..

Irritates like a BROTHER..

And finally loves you more than a LOVER.

(A very dear friend of mine shared this with me. I have never heard of a friend being described like this before, but I tell you that is exactly what she was to me. We were BFF's for many years and now have not seen each other in over 3 years. I miss her, I miss our friendship. We have just recently gotten back in contact with one another and I can only hope that our friendship will grow once again.)

2011-04-24T01:15:00.000-07:00

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE

All I need to know I learned from the Easter Bunny!

Don't put all your eggs in one basket.
Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.
There's no such thing as too much candy.
All work and no play can make you a basket case.
A cute tail attracts a lot of attention.
Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day.
Let happy thoughts multiply like rabbits.
Some body parts should be floppy. [AMEN!]
Keep your paws off of other people's jelly beans.
Good things come in small, sugar coated packages.
The grass is always greener in someone else's basket.
To show your true colors, you have to come out of the shell.
The best things in life are still sweet and gooey.

May the joy of the season fill your heart.

AND MAY GOD BLESS YOU!
Happy Easter!

Dimmed

2011-04-08T01:08:00.000-07:00

So I am in the car on my way home and it is dark, and all of a sudden I realize I don’t know where the high beams are. NO, I am not driving a new car; I am driving my car that I have driven for the last several years. Yup, you heard me; I had no idea where the high beams were located. My mind was blank. Thank goodness no one was behind me. Thank goodness I wasn’t that far from the house. I kept trying to remember where they are located. Are they on the left hand side of the dash, maybe the floor, oh wait I finally stumbled across it, they are on the windshield wipers, you just gotta push out. Phew, that was a close one.

I made it home and then freaked out! I freaked out because I would have never done anything like that before, and now it is becoming more and more “normal” for me. I hate it. It scares me, worries me, and frustrates me to say the least. Have you ever forgotten where something is or how to do something that you never imagined you would?

Ever wonder what would happen if cats had opposable thumbs...

2011-03-09T01:56:00.000-08:00

Originally I was planning on posting a nice piece about Fat Tuesday and Lent and what this means to Catholics and me (really). BUT earlier today a friend of mine sent me this video and I just couldn't help but to share it. I mean most likely I will post the piece on Lent later on during Lent, I mean I have 40 days, but I HAD to share this one today!!

This is for all of the Cat ~~people~~ Lovers out. I have often asked myself this same question..."What would happen if Cats did have opposable thumbs?" My 2nd cat that I had, was a polydactyl cat (having extra toes, like a baseball mitt, or like thumbs) and was named after that as well, Thums. I know original, eh? Anyway.... here is a short video of how some people think it might IF cats did have thumbs... I tend to agree as we all know just how dam smart cats are!

Medicare and SHIPtalk

2011-02-10T19:15:00.000-08:00

I was approved for permanent disability aka SSI. Yeah! Oh Shit! I mean it is good that I was finally approved but still surreal and scary at the same time. I am 39 years old (try not to spread that around too much will ya?) and it hits me more a little bit everyday that this is where my life is right now. Totally NOT where I had thought, hoped or planned to be at this time in my life, ya know? Course than again, I am not sure there are too many people out there that planned this. I have now received the 2 years of back pay that was owed to me. As of right now I have a rather LARGE lump sum sitting in my account that is screaming at me to pay off all of my bills and get square. Put some aside if possible. You know? But I still haven’t found out what is the amount that I will have to pay back to my LTD insurance so until I get that amount I can only look at that lump sum and dream a little dream. Sigh… I swear when I look at my account online my eyes turn into dollar signs!

I now also have Medicare. Yeah! Right? The last 2 days I have been on the phone with Medicare and Social Security. If you have any questions let me know and I am pretty sure I can assist you. LOL I have been to both of their websites and spoken to people as well. Don’t get me wrong it can be overwhelming to say the least. I thought I would share some tidbits of information so when/if the time comes for you to go down this path this might help you.

Medicare (God help us all)
This alone can be confusing and overwhelming. I suggest going to their website first. Even if you haven’t reached the appropriate age (65) or received the paperwork stating the award I highly recommend visiting the website. This will help you a lot. On the website there is a section that allows you to compare Drug and Health plans. This is extremely useful. It will ask for your Medicare # but since you most likely will not have it yet you can just skip that question, as well as you will need to skip the date you became eligible and your birthday. So you will basically put in your zip code and hit enter. Make sure you have all of your medications with you. You will then be brought to another page and in this section you can add all of your medications so that when you are comparing plans you can also see how much the medications will cost using a retail pharmacy or a mail order pharmacy. Once you create a drug list, it will give you drug list id # and the password date. Make sure you make a note of this so you can continue to use this on this site. It is very useful. It will also be useful when/if you need to talk to someone at Medicare. You will be brought to the next page which allows you to select a pharmacy. Once you select a pharmacy (it is not necessary but helpful) it will then take you to look at the plans that are available in the zip code you provided. While looking at Medicare plans you will see that there are Medigap policies, Medicare with drug coverage, Medicare without drug coverage and Prescription Drug plans.

I suggest you think about what you are really looking for in coverage. Do you have a lot of medications that need to be covered, are they generics or brands only? Do you need DME services (durable medical equipment, which might include oxygen, diabetes supplies, cpap supplies/machines, walkers, beds, wheelchairs, etc)? Are you in the hospital a lot? What about home health care is that something you need to think about? Are you interested in having dental and/or vision coverage as well? What about alternative services, as in acupuncture and chiropractor? These are all questions that only you can answer as far as what you will need/want to have covered. Only YOU know really what your health has been like and basically where it is headed. Think about it before jumping into anything. They offer HMO, PPO and PDP plans. If you already have medical insurance and are happy with it and don’t want Medicare you don’t have to take it. Remember that. However you must do it within the allotted enrollment period. You have a 3 month period prior to and after your 65th birthday. If you have been awarded Medicare you only have 3 months.

There is also another organization SHIP that you might find of some help. Medicare actually told me about them. They are a free service and will talk to you on the phone or come to your home. They are a non-biased company that will go over all of the medicare available plans with you to help you figure out what is best suited for your needs. Sounds good to me don't you think?
**All of the webistes that I used for examples for Medicare I used a general zip code so when you use it please remember to put in your zip code so that you will get the information that suits you best**

Past lives & Compassion

2011-01-30T01:27:00.000-08:00

I am a big believer that we are all here on earth to learn lessons. I think that we stay as long as it takes us to learn what we are supposed to learn and as long as it takes us to teach others what we were supposed to teach them. Several years back I was fortunate enough to “stumble” across a book (Journey of Souls) by Dr. Michael Newton. The book is about how he came to be involved with doing past life regressions. At the back of the book it listed his contact information in case you were interested in being regressed. Let me tell you I couldn't wait to send him a letter.

I was in my mid 20’s and this book just woke me up like nothing before. I have always been interested in the spiritual world and what we might have been in other lives and how we went from life to life, so I couldn’t wait to contact him. I was fortunate enough to be able to meet with him and have a session. This was several years ago (around 1996) and at that time he lived in Grass Valley, CA. I don’t really remember how long the session was or how much the fee was. I do remember that it was taped and I do have the tapes. I can recall some of the session but when I listen to the tapes it just floods my being. This is simply an experience that I will never forget. I don’t know how anyone could forget something like that. I highly recommend that if at all possible everyone should experience that.

I can remember 2 of my previous lives. In one of them I was an extremely rich and beautiful woman. I basically had no flaws (interior/exterior) and I knew it and acted like it. I didn’t really treat anyone very nice. I guess I didn’t feel/think I had to. I was healthy and just gorgeous. My face and body …everyone was envious. I didn’t work and I traveled everywhere. I did not have any children. Although I “had” everything, inside I was not really happy. My next life, I was an extremely obese man. I was by myself. My parents died when I was young and now I was ALL ALONE. No one liked me, everyone made fun of me. I had no friends. I got to be so big I was unable to work, so I basically stayed at home as much as possible. I would go out only when I had to, for doctor appointments and to the grocery store. I could no longer fit behind the wheel of a car so I had to take the bus or walk, both of which were extremely difficult and embarrassing for me. I ate myself to death basically. I was miserable. No doubt about that.

Now I am in this life. I have always said I picked my parents. In fact I can remember doing just that. I can picture it like it was yesterday. I know it might sound a bit strange but it is true. I picked my family because I knew they needed me. I knew that my mom was going to have health issues. I also knew that I would too, but not to this degree that is for sure.

So I was talking to my therapist a few weeks back about this and she asked me what I thought I had learned from my other lives I mentioned that I was now able to be a caregiver/caretaker and I loved doing it, as in my 1st life there is no way I would have done something like that. I would have paid someone, but there was no way I would have done something like that. I knew what it was like to be kind and compassionate, respectful of others. I know how to work and enjoy it. I have a better understanding of other’s feelings and always treat others the way I would like to be treated. I told her at least that is some of what I think I have learned and show it and hope to continue to learn and teach others more.

After discussing this for a short time, she brought something to my attention. Compassion. I do NOT have compassion for myself. I never really thought about it like that but I guess I don’t. I have been told before that I am very hard on myself but I never really saw it like that. I have always tried to do the best at everything /anything that I do. I always want to do better and not make any mistakes. When I do make mistakes I am told that I am much too tough on myself. I was asked that if someone else made some of the mistakes that I make what /how would I react. I explained that if it is nothing major I would most likely try to make a joke out of it and let them know it is nothing to worry about /stress over and to move on. When in reality if I make that same mistake, I just about kill myself with negativity. I never really thought about it like that or even realized that I was doing that. Hell I have been doing that my entire life.

So now I have been challenged to learn to be compassionate towards myself! I don’t even know how to begin to do that. She tells me to start off reading mantras, or positive quotes. Even if I start out with 1 a week that is at least a start. Funny thing is I have read so many self-help books out there I know I all this and know most of the mantras. However, you have to believe them when you say them. You have to be able to at least start to believe them.

So I ask you, do you have compassion for yourself? I mean there is no doubt that I do for others but now that it has been brought to my attention, I am well aware that I don’t for myself. I think this is going to be one of the hardest things I am going to have to learn how to do. I only hope I can learn how to do it…eventually… Any hints or ideas on how you think I might be able to work on this??

A nursing home for me?

2011-01-26T02:12:00.000-08:00

So awhile back I came across an article about how more and more young people are ending up in nursing homes. With me having health issues and all it got the best of me. I read it and of course it really got me thinking. I mean how could it not right?
I am 39 yrs old and live with my mom who is also sick. Actually she is worse off than I am at least for now anyway. However, with all of the illnesses that I currently have and considering that for the last 2+ years they are not getting better or staying the same it tends to make me think about these things. I know she couldn’t take care of me, nor would I want her to. We don’t really have much for family. I do have a half sister who has offered to help care for us (I will write more about that in another post).

I have always been a very independent person. I LOVED working and taking care of my family (me and parents) and doing things. I have not been able to do that for some time now. I have visited nursing homes…some good some not so good. In fact downright scary. I was fortunate enough to be able to care for my Nana and father and neither of them had to go into a nursing home. However that may not be the case with me. I pray that isn’t the case but you just don’t know what the future holds.

But for those moments that I do let my mind drift to thoughts of a nursing home (Yikes!), I hope and pray for the following. I hope that if and when I do need to go to a nursing home I am fortunate to find one that is filled with not only skilled workers but loving ones as well. I hope that they treat everyone the way they would want their loved ones treated. Let it be a very clean, safe and affordable facility. I hope that they would have field trips, and movies, games (indoor/outdoor), and food other than pureed. Let it be possible to have it sectioned by age at least to a point anyway.

For now I think positive (or at least try to most of the time), continue to do research because you can’t always leave it up to the doctors to figure out what is going to work for everyone and keep mushing on. I can only that I won’t end up in a nursing home and you won’t either no matter what the age is.

I am so flattered, thanks Dr. Wasserstein!!

2011-01-24T10:11:00.000-08:00

In Sept 2009 I had Gum grafting done. I wrote a blog about my experience. Basically that is what my blog is my opinion and my experiences in this world. I originally was to have the procedure done by Dr. Jack Wasserstein but ~~he did not live up to his end of the deal~~ things did not go as planned, so I found another doctor that took great care of me. Now what I find so humorous about this is that the original blog I wrote is 9 paragraphs with several pictures and it only talks about him in one sentence. Yes that is right, 1 sentence. I guess this has really been bothering him. Granted that one sentence was a negative one but still it was one sentence. Anyway I guess he googled his name one day because he must not have much to do and came across my blog since it does list his name. So he sent me an email. Oh mind you this is an entire year (Aug 2010) later when he does this. He asks me to remove this from the web. I explain to him that this is my blog and it expresses my opinions and feelings. And anyway it is only 1 sentence. I googled his name, out of all of the pages that came up everything was positive except my one blog. Just think if I had done what I originally wanted to do and do an entire blog post just on the situation that happened with him and his office. Boy he really would have been pissed off. LOL But I refrained and only put the one sentence in. So anyway in Jan 2011, he decided to post a comment on that blog!! At first when I saw it all I could do was laugh. I mean really? And to think this is a grown professional man getting all upset over one little sentence. So he posted a comment and put “his side” of the story. I decided to leave it as is and not post a reply as to what really happened. Instead I thought I would just post a new blog and thank him for more sending more traffic to my site.

Thanks Jack!!

Joke time - The Three Bears with a twist

2011-01-19T10:46:00.000-08:00

A Priest, a Pentecostal Preacher, and a Rabbi all served as chaplains to the students of University of Minnesota.

They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a
bear. One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it.

Seven days later, they're all together to discuss their experience.

Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has various bandages on his body and limbs, goes first. "Well," he says, "I went into the woods to find a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from the catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle
as a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation."

Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an IV drip in his arm, and both legs in casts. In his best fire and brimstone oratory he exclaimed, "WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle!
I went out and I FOUND a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED
him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent
the rest of the day praising Jesus."

The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with monitors and IV's running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape.

The Rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start..."

Joke time - Only a farm kid

2011-01-12T22:46:00.000-08:00

When you're from the country ~ your perception is a little different..

A Missouri farmer in his pickup, drove to a neighbor's, and knocked at the door. A boy, about 9, opened the door.

"Is your Dad home?"
"No sir, he isn't; he went to town."
"Well, is your Mother here?"
"No sir, she went to town with Dad."
"How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?"
"No sir, He went with Mom and Dad."

The rancher stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other, and mumbling to himself..

"Is there anything I can do for you? I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can give dad a message."

"Well," said the rancher uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to your Dad. It's about your brother Howard getting my daughter, Suzie, pregnant."'

The boy thought for a moment.
"You would have to talk to Dad about that.

I know he charges $500 for the bull and $50 for the hog, but I don't know how much he charges for Howard."

Complainers. . .

2011-01-11T01:41:00.000-08:00

You ever come across one of those people that complain about everything and everyone? Do you have a friend or family member like that? You know the type I am talking about no matter what it is they find something to complain about. It is just them. They complain about everything. The sky isn’t blue enough, it is too windy, it is too hot, not hot enough. They never ever seem to be happy. I never knew it was even possible to complain about half of the stuff they complain about and yet there always seems to be more to complain about because they find more and then find more! It still amazes me when I come across someone like that or run into “that person”. The complainer.

We have a friend of the family who is a complainer. I would actually call him the KING of Complainers. I don’t think I ever realized or understood the art of complaining until I met him. He complains about everything and then some. It still amazes me when I come across someone like that or run into “the person”. The complainer. It is too cold, too windy, too rainy, too hot, and too dry. If he is talking about work, then by all means he is never making enough money, they never appreciate him enough, and he always does more than he should. When he has been out of work he refuses to look for work out of his field of expertise (personal chef) because that would be lowering his standard. Ok…but if you haven’t worked in over 2 years and are no longer getting unemployment how the hell else are you going to support yourself? Because the last time I checked complaining does not pay the bills. A job basically fell into his lap. A friend needed a driver because he was without a driver’s license and he could not do his job unless he had a driver. How perfect. Right? He would have the complainer drive him and pay him under the table. They would be helping each other out. Not long into this great deal the complainer soon felt that he should get paid if he worked or not. Then he started that he could no longer drive at night. The whole thing was so that the other guy didn’t have to drive at all as his license was suspended. DUH!! I tell you, here he was being helped out and it still wasn’t good enough for him.
I talked to the complainer about this one time. He looked at me and smiled and said “you know, baby, people like me are just complainers, we aren’t happy unless we are complaining about something….well everything really.”(followed by a little laughter).

I don't know but through my eyes it sure does seem to take a hell of a lot more energy and time to complain about everything then to just go along or try to make the best out of it. Don't ya think?

SNOWING!

2011-01-02T22:41:00.000-08:00

I live in Southern California and they say it doesn't snow here. Well, they lied! I have lived in this neighborhood for 22 yrs and this is the 3rd time it has snowed. This is the most it has snowed. It snowed for several hours and stuck quite a bit, you know for not snowing that is! It looked pretty, it was cold (42 degrees) and I was glad to be inside a nice warm house. No, I did NOT go outside and make a snowman or snowballs. I just enjoyed watching it fall. Hope you get a kick out of my pics.

My backyard right after it started snowing

Down my street

My neighbors house/car

Our yard with much more snow. Doesn't it look pretty??

Our neighbors house (my mom's bff)

Another pic of yard and hills behind

Our jasmine bush

A little palm in our front yard - that was when it first snowed, now they are covered, and truthfully I think pretty much dead.

Happy New Year!!!

2010-12-31T00:15:00.000-08:00

My Wish for You in 2011

May peace break into your home and may thieves come to steal your debts.

May the pockets of your jeans become a magnet for $50 bills.

May love stick to your face like Vaseline and may laughter assault your lips!

May happiness slap you across the face and may your tears be that of joy.

May the problems you had, forget your home address!

In simple words ...............

May the year 2011 be the best year of your life!!!

Happy New Year!!

Christmas Past, Present and Future. . .

2010-12-29T21:58:00.000-08:00

I can remember how Christmas was growing up and even into my adulthood. Although I basically grew up as an only child we always had nice Christmases. It was either the 3 of us (mom, dad and I) or many times my Nana (my mom’s mom) would be with us as well. We always (and I do mean always) decorated the outside of the house. It didn’t matter where we lived it got decorated. Dad took care of that. It seemed that each year we he would do more. Even though he would “complain” about it and say how he “hated” doing it and that next year he wasn’t going to decorate he would always look forward to doing it the following year. Each year we he always added something, more lights, or snowmen (mom collected snowmen so they were our theme) something always seemed to get added. Mom and I took care of the inside. In the beginning the living room would be the main room that would be decorated. It always looked nice. As time went on and we collected more items we were able to decorate all of the rooms. It looked great! All of the rooms managed to have a little bit of Christmas spirit and the outside was covered with it as well. It was always nice to have people over because they always remarked at how nice the house looked inside and out. I use to tease about our house looking similar to Clark Griswold’s house but let’s face it ours always looked better. Heck we always took first place in our neighborhood. We usually either had a few relatives over for Christmas dinner or some friends that didn’t have family and they would come over for the day. That was always nice.

Recently Christmas is lacking a whole lotta something, ok a whole lotta everything. My father passed so the outside no longer gets decorated. That sucks!! Even if we couldn’t have the house decorated as awesomely as he had always done it, it would still be great to at least have some lights up. Ya know? And now we hardly even decorate inside the house. We still have a ton of decorations for inside and outside it is just too damn difficult for me. This also sucks. All the decorations are in the sheds. With neither mom nor I feeling all that hot to trot we are not up to doing all that. It is A LOT of work to make several trips to bring in Christmas decorations, then to set everything up and then to take all of the empty boxes back to the sheds. I know that would take me several days and then would put me outta commission for several more days. I barely have a small tree up with lights only on it and a few Christmas decorations, and I do mean very few. Now it is just mom and I. There is nothing wrong with that; I mean quiet Christmases can be nice…sometimes. Now I cook a small Christmas dinner for the 2 of us and I don’t have to worry about having to entertain anyone if either of us are not feeling well on that day. We can lay around in our pj’s or stay in bed till whenever depending on how we are feeling.

As for Christmas Future I can only hope it will be similar to Christmas Past. I know that may sound a bit strange to many of you but humor me. I would like to see the outside and inside decorated like it had been in Christmas Past. I would love to be able to be the one doing the inside decorating again. Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to feel well enough to have people over and cook for a house full? Be able to decorate and not be out of commission for several days? But one of the things I hope for most of all is to have a child to celebrate Christmas with because those are the best holidays yet. Wouldn't you agree??

Senior Texting Codes

2010-12-23T22:54:00.000-08:00

I have never been one that is all that into texting. Yes I do text but that is not my preferred way of communication. A friend of mine sent this to me and I found it rather funny...yet scary at the same time because in the back of my mind I was thinking how much longer will it be till I am using these codes???

SENIOR TEXTING CODE

Since more and more Seniors are texting and tweeting, there appears to be a need for a STC (Senior Texting Code). If you qualify for Senior Discounts this is the code for you.

ATD: At The Doctor's ( I could use this now, as that is where I spend most of my time now)
BFF: Best Friend Farted
BTW: Bring The Wheelchair (I have to do that already)
BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM: Covered By Medicare (Soon I will be covered by medicare.. and that sucks!)
CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center
DWI: Driving While Incontinent ( I am almost there now...)
FWB: Friend With Beta Blockers
FWIW: Forgot Where I Was (This happens to me already and I am not a senior)
FYI: Found Your Insulin
GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
GHA: Got Heartburn Again (Join the club.. that is my life)
HGBM: Had Good Bowel Movement (those are few and far between... they should be celebrated!)
IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL: Living On Lipitor
LWO: Lawrence Welk's On
OMMR: On My Massage Recliner (Oh how I wish I had one of those!)
OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas (This is not something that just seniors get, eveyone else just blames the dog!)
ROFL, CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing, Can't Get Up ( Gee, sounds too familiar)
SGGP: Sorry, Gotta Go Poop (When you gotta go, you don't want to lose the moment they aren't often)
TTYL: Talk To You Louder ( I do this anyway for my mom)
WAITT: Who Am I Talking To? (I wonder this alot already)
WTFA: Wet The Furniture Again (Thank Goodness not yet anyway!)
WTP: Where's The Prunes? (I will use something else besides prunes...yuck!)
WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil (hopefully I will be able to afford a slick scooter!)
GLK: Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking In (and we shouldn't keep that waiting b/c then the furniture will be wet!)

The items in blue ( ) were my comments but I hope you all got a giggle out of them. I am assuming that at that age there is not sexting going on... if so I know I sure the hell won't be involved in it..hell I am not now, I wouldn't want to scare the hell outta anyway and then get sued for it!!!

Deck the Halls - sung by animals on YouTube

2010-12-22T22:50:00.000-08:00

I had 2 different friends send this to me. It was too funny not to share. That is in case you haven't already seen it. I hope you enjoy it.

Drunk on Christmas

2010-12-21T22:42:00.000-08:00

First of all if you don't already know I am a HUGE country music fan. Secondly I am also a huge Big & Rich fan whether they do a group or solo album I am there. So when I heard that John Rich and Jimmy Fallon did a song together and about Christmas I had to hear it. I find Jimmy Fallon very funny, and knowing how John Rich plays up, it was absolutely hilarious.

This is basically about all of those "Dysfunctional Families" out there and how we cope with them or at least how most of use would sure like to cope!!

Boots!

2010-11-30T03:08:00.000-08:00

Like most women I LOVE shoes. I mean right, who doesn't? It is one of those things that whether you need a pair or not, you just have to look when you are in the store. I love seeing all of the new up and coming designs of any type of shoes. I get a giggle out of looking at the children's (you know the itty bitty ones) shoes. I have ~~a few~~ tons of shoes. Tennis shoes, flip flops, sandals, high heels, low heels mid heels and flats. Let's face it you gotta have a shoe in every color and every heel height, it just wouldn't be right if you didn't. I think it might even be sacrilegious!! I will have to do more research on that one.

Anyway, I have not been a good blogger buddy lately so I am now trying to catch up on some of my reads that I do like to follow. I was reading Always in my Head and came across a most recent blog about an online clothing store. Now if we remember back to my previous post about online ordering we know that I don't tend to have much luck with that kind of thing. However, she mentioned ModCloth and showed a picture of a cute dress that she purchased. So I thought I would check this place out. OMG! They have tons of things... clothes, shoes, accessories, household things. Way cool. I was scrolling through the shoe section, because it was there and it was literally ~~calling~~ screaming my name. I am sure you have had the same thing happen to you. You can admit it to me. I won't go blabbing it all over the Internet or anything. :) Anyway I came across a pair of gorgeous brown boots. (I love browns, btw).

pic

Aren't these just ~~wonderful~~ dreamy (insert long heavy sigh)??? If you click on the link under the picture you can also see the other views of the boots. These really hit me as soon as I saw them.

I think might be falling in love...I mean a girl can NEVER have too many shoes!

Happy Thanksgiving

2010-11-25T01:28:00.000-08:00

“Turkey Day” - the infamous day that comes but once a year that allows everyone to over indulge in just about everything from watching sports and eating lots of turkey and carbs, to laying around afterwards because we are all so full of over indulging! Like I said it only comes but once a year. Everyone seems to have their own family traditions of what they eat or who does the cooking. I always find it interesting to hear other people’s traditions. Don’t you? Some are creatures of habit and others are always doing something new each year. I thought I would share some traditions of mine and of some friends.

This is "Thanksgiving"

~ A good friend of ours that is a chef went through a phase of deep frying his turkey and making a special marinade to inject into it. It was pretty tasty. Now for the last several years he enjoys making a duck instead of a turkey. I have yet to try that…not so sure I could do it. He actually leaves it to look like a duck. Umm... yeah that I could not handle.

~ Another friend of ours always has to have macaroni and cheese with their meal. If there is no homemade Mac and cheese, it is like a sin to them! We never did that growing up.

~ Some people seem to change off every other year. One year their house the next year the in-laws or a sister or something like that. Some have potluck, etc.

~For our Turkey Day there are always some things that have to be at the table otherwise it simply isn’t Thanksgiving. We make homemade Banana Nut Bread and Pumpkin Bread every year. I have yet to have anyone not like these breads. They are very yummy if I do say so myself. Then there are the deviled eggs. They always seem to go pretty quickly. Dad always really enjoyed them. It didn’t seem to matter if we were going to have a large gathering of family and friends or if it was just going to be “us” these items always are expected to be at the table. At those times when it would be just the three of us (mom, dad & me), dad would always say to mom and me to not go so overboard and kill ourselves with making so many dishes, but we always enjoyed it. We would say we were going to tone it down but by the time the day came it always seemed to happen. I am sure you know what I mean. For instance before you know it your menu consists of…turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, peas, rolls, sweet potatoes, peas, relish dish, deviled eggs, on occasion we would have a small ham, cranberries, cucumber salad or creamed cucumbers (a favorite of my mom’s), creamed corn, pumpkin and banana bread, pumpkin/apple/pecan/sweet potato pie (we might have all or one), chocolate pie or cake (since not everyone likes pumpkin and pecan) and ice cream. I think that about covers it. I mean besides the little munchies that you have out before the big meal. For the most part we always did Turkey Day. On rare occasions we went to an aunt’s house. But the food was NOT good. Sorry but it just wasn’t. By the time dinner came, everything was cold. She didn’t know how to cook everything at the same time so it would be done at the same time and everything would be ready and hot at the same time. Oh well, thank goodness that didn’t happen very often and we don’t do that anymore! Now that it is just usually mom and I we do cheat a little bit I am sad to say. I think it is more because of my health than anything else. Now I order a meal from somewhere, so I get the turkey, potatoes, gravy, and rolls. Then I basically just “doctor” it up a bit and heat it up. I still do some extra sides because that is just what I am used to. LOL The deviled eggs, and breads, and peas, cucumbers and a dessert and there you have it. We still get left over’s.

My infamous Deviled Eggs

What are your traditions? What items does your family insist be at the table on Thanksgiving?

I wish everyone a happy, healthy and blessed Thanksgiving. May you all eat to you are stuffed beyond your wildest dreams!

Happy Happy Birthday Sister!!

2010-11-24T01:50:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday Tina!

Just a quick shout out to my favorite half sister (oh wait she is my only sister!) to wish her a very happy and blessed Birthday! We are so different in our ways of thinking it is almost comical at times! But that is what makes the world go round, once she realizes I am always right then things will be perfect! ha ha (I am teasing Tina).

I hope that she has a stress free day filled with treats and a year blessed with love, laughter and good health. Enjoy your day and know that you are in my thoughts! xo

Tina when she came for a surprise visit to see Dad in 2006

That is your reference point?

2010-11-20T00:20:00.000-08:00

If you have an illness or injury or are in chronic pain, I am pretty sure you have had someone if not many people tell you that they “know what you are going through”. They understand you. They get you. And then my favorite part comes and they compare a pain of theirs to yours. OMG! Really??? I have had this happen to me for years. I have had many different people tell me that they know what it is like to be “tired”. Now I laugh, because I am like really? I would love to be tired, I am fucking exhausted beyond your imagination and you are telling me you are tired. If I was “tired” I wouldn’t even think of complaining. That isn’t even worth mentioning. Or how about when people tell you that they have a “headache” so they totally understand when you say you have a migraine, oh but wait a minute I have had my migraine for years. I mean it is practically a freaking part of me. You are going to tell me that they sympathize with what I am going through? NO. NO they don’t. No they can’t. No they have no frickin’ clue as to what I have and am experiencing. And by all means please don’t tell me you do.

However, my most recent “comparison” was by far the most upsetting, and most unbelievable. The other day I was talking with someone who happens to be a nurse and a friend of ours. We were talking about having to keep the faith and how difficult that can be when you are not feeling well and it seems as if the cards are stacked against you. She then proceeded to tell me how she totally understands what I am going through because she has the same thing every day! Every morning when she gets up she has to run her hands under warm water so that she can even move them and while she is doing that she prays to the Lord asking him to help her hands work that day. I know I had to have the most shocked look on my face. I kept thinking I couldn’t have heard her right. I mean right? I just couldn’t have. I just sat there for a moment quietly thinking OH MY GOD in my head. I am not saying that no one else experiences pain but how could you even think of comparing that to me? Here she is comparing her hands hurting to where she has to run them under warm water so that she can move them to my excruciating pain, exhaustion, memory, focus problems, constant migraines and concentration issues. That is like comparing apples and oranges. She is in her 50’s and is able to work. Here I am in my late 30’s and am applying for permanent disability. I can’t work. I can barely move and walk at times. Don’t you think that if I could run my body under warm water and it would relieve my pain so that I could move, don’t you think I would frickin do that? Geesh! I would live in a flippin shower or bath if that is what I had to do so that I could be without pain, or lessen it or make it so that I could still live a “normal” life. I tried explaining to her this. And she said I know I know, I get it. I think the only thing that stopped me from going psycho is that we were in a public place! I told her No you don’t get it. Mom kept saying that you did, but I knew you didn’t. I had hoped you did, but I knew you didn’t. I guess in a sense I can understand why she doesn’t because she has never had to experience anything like this. She kept trying to justify and compare the hand thing. I had to tell her to stop.

If you have gone through something like this then you can imagine and sympathize. If you have not, then don’t even try to say that you get it; because you just don’t. You aren’t even close. You can try to imagine, but that is it, you are doing just that TRYING.

I couldn’t believe that she was actually comparing hands hurting to excruciating body pain that doesn’t allow someone to work or live their life anymore. That is just two totally different things as far as I am concerned.

I got approved!

2010-11-19T02:11:00.000-08:00

I have been off of work since April 2008. I know, it still sounds surreal to me. Since I was not getting any better it had been decided that I needed to move forward in seeking SSDI . I had written a previous blog about that here. It has been a long road. I was denied twice. So once that happens it usually goes to the next level of a hearing.

I have to say that I feel very fortunate to have had the help that I did. I was one of those people that when I signed up for benefits at work, I picked the short term and long term disability. Everyone always teased me about being young and “wasting” my money. Well, let me tell you, it was some of the best money I have ever spent!

On a quick side note here is some information that I think you might find helpful. The short term disability pays you for the first year that you have to be off of work. The LTD pays you after that. Now depending on what type you have and how it is set up make a huge difference. Usually they are based on a percentage of what you make. You can sign up to be paid a percentage of what your normal salary is. The amount that I had to pay on a monthly basis to purchase this insurance was minimal and it was well worth it. If you chose to get LTD please make sure that you select to at least get 50% of your salary if not more. Now if for some horrible reason you are unable to go back to work and actually end up needing to go on permanent disability your LTD company does not want to have to continue to pay this entire amount to you for the rest of your life. So they start preparing you to start applying for permanent disability. The LTD that I have has a 3rd party company, ALLSUP that helps you go through the entire SSDI process. I cannot tell you enough about how AWESOME this company is. They basically do ALL of the WORK. They are the ones that request all of the doctor’s records, and pay for them if need be, they fill out all of the paperwork for SSDI, and they keep all of the records. They basically do all of the legwork and then some. When it came time for my hearing they had a representative, a lawyer that called me a couple of weeks prior so that we could discuss my case and then we met a short time before my hearing to go over anything. I know that my case depended a lot on what my doctors had to say and if they sent in their notes and answered the questionnaires like they were supposed to, but I also know a large part was due to my representative, Deborah. She has been doing this for 18 years and has a great history with these judges.

Ok…back to the real reason of the blog. Good thing I don’t really ramble on and get side tracked. Phew! So the hearing was in Downtown Los Angeles. It had already been arranged that my mom’s BFF, Dee would go with me so that I wouldn’t have to drive or be alone for that matter. She also happens to be a nurse so that was kind of nice in case of anything. We got there with basically no traffic and found the place with no problems. Yeah for us!! We even got there a bit early! Yeah for us again! I have never done anything like this before so it was an eye opener to say the least. The entire 4th floor of the building is for Social Security Hearings. Once you get off of the floor there is an armed guard. You have to sign in, show your picture ID, he then looks through your purse and then does the wand thing over you to see if you are carrying anything metal. Oh yeah, and makes sure he reminds you to turn your cell phone off, NOW. He was a nice guy. So now you are in a large waiting area. Once it is your turn the Judges clerk will come and call you.

Deborah (my representative) had told me that it shouldn’t take any longer than 30 minutes. Can you believe that? I have been turned down twice and yet a judge will be able to say yay or nay in less than 30 minutes. Well sure enough when it was our time, the Judge wanted to see Deborah first for a few minutes. Then she came back to get me. If we were in there for 15 minutes, I am exaggerating. So basically we were in a small room, with the judge, his clerk, a vocational expert, my rep. (Deborah) and me. I was sworn in and the judge proceeded to ask me a couple of questions. It was very relaxed. This judge happened to be in a jovial mood and also tends to have a sarcastic sense of humor (I was in luck!!). He asked me a couple of questions about a doctor, and something about one of my meds, and asked what type of education I had. Asked what I did when I worked, if I lived alone. He asked me what I thought was the one thing that I would say is the thing that makes it so unbearable for me to work. I asked him if he meant illness or symptom. He smiled and said, it doesn’t matter just pick one. So I smiled and said, only one? Hmmmm.. and he interrupted and said ok so tell me all. I then told him what all of issues were but that the most upsetting were the mind issues. I don’t have the concentration, the focus, the memory, I don’t have that like I used to. I miss it. Don’t get me wrong, the pain, exhaustion, migraines, tremors, they all suck and all hurt, but the mental part is really killing me….slowly. He then looked at my earnings and told me that I made good money while I worked. I smiled and agreed with him. He then informed me that I wouldn’t be making that kind of money if I was on disability. I kind of chuckled and said that I was aware of that, but God willing maybe I won’t have to be on this for the rest of my life. He got a large smile and said, I agree with you, hopefully you won’t. He advised me that even if I did get disability I would still have to see my doctors. I was like, yes I know that. He then told me that I would be getting something every 2-5 years to check to see if I was still disabled or not. When I get that I have to answer it and/or send in new medical records. He then said good luck and that he hopes I get better soon and that I am not in as much pain as I have been in. I know I was in shock.

Deborah and I got up and walked out of the room. I looked at her and said that’s it? That means I got approved, right? She said yes, congratulations! She said I would probably get a letter around 2 weeks or so. With this disability I will also be able to have Medicare. I was not aware of that, or if I was I didn’t remember it. She said it will take around 2 months to get that. I will also have back pay coming to me. Since I have been on LTD for 24 months that is how much I will be expecting. However, since I have receiving the LTD, they will take the difference of what is owed to them. So I am not really sure what or if I will have anything left over from the back pay.

To say that I was exhausted would be a HUGE understatement. After the hearing was over and we returned home, I made mom and me some lunch. I changed into some ~~comfy clothes~~ pajamas since I was just going to be in the house. I laid down with mom on the bed to watch T.V. and before I knew it I was out like a light. I guess it really did take everything out of me.

I am thankful that this is over. I am grateful and appreciative to everyone who sent me positive thoughts and prayers.

I am finally approved!! Yeah for me!

Congratulations!!

2010-11-15T01:07:00.000-08:00

Congratulations Lewin Family!

I just wanted to send out a little "shout out" if you will to a friend with whom I used to work with. He and his wife adopted a beautiful baby boy, Nicholas. It took them a long 3 years but everything finally fell into place. They brought him home from Russia not too long ago. He is a healthy, happy 3 year old toddler boy. I am so very happy and thrilled for them.

Enjoy every moment that you can with him. It will go by so fast you will wonder where it went. Congratulations and God Bless you!!

Nicholas Lewin

Mirror, Mirror

2010-10-21T00:37:00.000-07:00

So when I was in my 20's I looked like the girl in the mirror. Now in my 30's I look closer to the girl looking into the mirror. I swear when I look in my mirror at home, I still look like that svelte 20 something year old. Yet when I walk by a window or some other mirror, I am just about knocked over with utter shock to see that the person looking back at me is really me and it is so NOT that svelte 20 something yr old that I see in my mind! Anyone else have that same bitch following them around?

Voting time

2010-10-17T01:04:00.000-07:00

**VOTE ****VOTE ****VOTE ****VOTE ****VOTE **

With all of the talk of the upcoming elections I thought this topic might be fitting for the situation. I have entered both of my animals into The World’s Coolest Dog & Cat Show on Dogster & Catster. It is a pretty great site if you haven’t already heard about it or belong to already. That is right here I am like the other candidates begging, praying, wishing, hoping for your vote. I am not going to tell lies about the other candidates, because we don’t play that way. I am not going to show you pictures of them being bad and caught in the act or of their owners doing unthinkable things. I am sure you can just imagine what some of those things are. It makes me shudder actually. So I am just going to tell you about how WONDERFUL Chip & Tee-Tee are.

I invite you to check out all of the candidates, but I implore you to come back to the sweet pictures of Tee-Tee (doggy) & Chip (kitty) and vote for them. There are several categories that you can vote for. I have entered Tee-Tee into 2 categories and Chip into 5 categories.

Here are the easy steps to vote for Chip and Tee-Tee. If you are going to vote for other animals then please don't use these simple steps to help you figure out how to vote for other animals. :) You will just have to stumble along and figure it out on your own. hee he

1. Go to http://catster.com/show10/

2. If you have a FB account then you can log in using the Facebook connect. If not then if you already have an account with Dogster.com or Catser. com you can log in and vote. If you do not have an account with either then you will need to register. However, I swear it is easy peasy! I promise.

3. Once you have logged in and are on this page http://catster.com/show10/ you will need to enter in their ID#'s

4. Chip's # is 1132482 and Tee-Tee's # is 1132484. When voting there are 5 paw prints and you can choose from 1(being the lowest) to 5 (being the highest), you will need to decide how low or high you wish to vote for the photo and then click on the vote button. Once it has accepted it it will say VOTED. I can only hope that you would want to vote 5 paws for all of the pics. If anyone needs any persuasion of any kind please let me know and we will see what we can do to accomodate your needs. You scratch our back, we will scratch and massage your back!! (Yikes, I am sounding just like those horrible politicians!!?

Here one of the pics I entered of Chip~

Vote for Chip in the World's Coolest

cat pictures & breed info

Here is one of the pics I entered of Tee-Tee~

Vote for Tee-Tee in the World's Coolest

dog pictures & breed info

~~So come on people get out there and VOTE!!!!~~

OK I’m up!!! I’m up!!!

2010-10-16T11:29:00.000-07:00

It is a dark and dreary morning and I am snuggled in bed. The phone rings at 8:03 am. As far as I am concerned that is sacrilegious. Especially since no one has to be up at that hour in my household on that day. Anyway, it is a doctor’s office and I answer it and take care of it. I get up and go pee since I am awake, right? I know TMI? Oh well you are the one reading this and by now y’all should know what to expect from me…you never know what to expect from me. So I get back in bed all comfy and that damn phone rings again 10 min later. Really people? OK another doctor’s office. Granted mom has been ill, but is it necessary for all of them to call before the crack of dawn? Geesh! Granted if I was a normal person (no comments from the peanut gallery here folks) I would have already been up and at work for at least 2 hours, but we are not talking about normal people now are we? Ok let’s try this one more time. I let Tee-Tee out to go pee and make sure that this time I can at least, God willing rest for a bit longer. See, I stay up late and the night before I did just that. So I need, ok WANT to get a bit more sleep. I crawl into bed and start dozing and 30 minutes later the phone rings again… OK I AM UP!!! Obviously it is not meant for me to sleep. Right? I mean that is how I am taking it.

So the next day is Saturday morning and there is a pounding on our front door at 9am. Ok… does someone hate me? I am not supposed to sleep in anymore? Am I supposed to go to bed early now or what? Another dark and dreary day and there is POUNDING on m front door. UGH!! So I throw on my glasses (since I normally wear contacts) and go to the front door. I am still in pj’s and am trying to finger comb my short wild woman from Borneo hair down as to not scare the holy hell out of anyone.

Granted I didn't have coffee or slippers but I pretty much felt like this.
pic

I open the door and there stand 3 little boys from the house behind me. Now get this… their father (whom by the way happens to be an ASSHOLE but that is another blog) took one of their sneakers and hit it with a bat and knocked it into my yard. WTF??? And that was for???? So I let the ~~rug rats~~ darling children into my yard to see if they could find it. They were unable to. They think it was on top of one of our sheds. I told them I would check it out later when I was more awake.

Again I come back to bed and think I am going to try this again. The phone rang 20 min later and this time it was a wrong number! I give up. I am up.!! I am up!!!

Hope you all have a great weekend!

CUJO reborn

2010-09-27T01:05:00.000-07:00

Tee-Tee

Doesn’t she look sweet and innocent? Yeah, I know she does. This is my little brown girl. This is also the one known as my Dad’s ~~perfect~~ favorite daughter, Tee-Tee. The reason she was known as this is because she simply was his favorite. I mean let’s think about it, she never talked back, never asked for money, or rides anywhere. She always wanted to be with him. See, favorite daughter. Heck, it took the pressure off of me.

After Dad passed, Tee-Tee became diabetic. I kept telling him that if she did become diabetic he was going to have to give her the injections. Humph! Wouldn’t you know it, she doesn’t become diabetic till after he dies. Once again it just goes to show you just how much she does love him. She waited to become diabetic until after he died so he wouldn’t have to give her the insulin shots. Let’s face it, we know Dad wouldn’t have been able to do it, and it still would have fallen on me.

I have to give her 2 shots a day. Once in the a.m. after her breakfast. That one seems to go pretty easy. I am thinking because she also gets 3 little pills at that time. I know most dogs you would have to trick them into taking the pills. NOT this one. She thinks they are treats and can’t wait for them. One is a liver flavored glucosamine and the other 2 are homeopathic tablets, Traumeel. They are for her hip and back pain. They are sugar coated so basically taste like candy to her. They are ok for her to have with her diabetes, don’t worry I checked it all out.

However, when I give her the shot in the p.m. it has become a joke. It is like she turns into CUJO. I guess she thinks it is supposed to scare me….but it doesn’t. I just smile at her and tell her to give me a kiss. She does but the whole time she is showing me her teeth (as if to scare me).

This is what Tee-Tee turns into when she gets her nightly insulin shot!

My nephew got married!

2010-09-25T01:21:00.000-07:00

Seth & Amberlie Owens

My nephew got married on Sept 18, 2010. I still can’t believe it. It seems surreal really. My sister has 4 children and this is her oldest, Seth. They live in Alabama and I really don’t know any of her children, my nieces and nephews. It’s strange to say that and know that. I have met Seth and Caleb her 2 oldest sons. They were young… not even sure if they remember me. Ok… back onto the real subject. (Can you tell that this bothers me??)

Seth got married! He freaking got married. He married his girlfriend, Amberlie. I have never met or talked to her. They are both young. I am happy for them. The wedding was a quick wedding. They say they are not preggers. As long as they are happy that is all that matters.

Truth be told when I heard he was getting married I was a bit sad or disappointed. Not that I didn’t want him to get married. It is just that I had always imagined, well I truthfully imagined that Dad (Paw-Paw) would be there. But I guess he was there, looking down on Seth. Seth was his first grandchild. They had a special bond. Anyway I had always thought that we would be able to go; that there would be plenty of time to plan and for me and mom (Maw-Maw) to be there. To be able to be there and see everyone for a joyous occasion and not a sad one. To be able to celebrate in their new beginning.

I guess it wasn’t meant to be…

So I hope they had a beautiful wedding. I pray for them to be blessed with everlasting love, good health, common sense (b/c let’s face it not enough people in this world have it let alone know what it is),enough money to always pay the bills and have a little left over. May they be filled with love, and happiness in their souls and hearts.

Mr. & Mrs. Seth Owens on their wedding day

I had to include a picture of the cakes. My sister, Tina did them. She did the flowers and cakes from my understanding.

Wedding Cakes

Easy Targets?

2010-09-23T23:48:00.000-07:00

I am sure you have heard me complain or get on my soapbox about this before, but I just feel I have to air this out another time. We are being walked all over again. Why is that? Are we easy targets? Do we have “SUCKER” written on our faces? What? Seriously, what is the freaking problem?

We have had some much needed work done around the house. We have had several different “handy man” or licensed contractors here to do the work. It doesn’t seem to matter who refers them to us, if they are licensed or not we always end up getting screwed. I just don’t get it. Anyone know why this always seems to happen? I like to think we are good people. We pray. We treat everyone nice, like how we would like to be treated. I mean seriously what gives?

We go over everything we want done with them and what we expect. They always seem so nice and genuine. My mom is so trusting, too trusting for her own good. Me on the other hand we have been screwed so many times I don’t trust anyone anymore. I hate to say that but it is true. I never thought I would be like that either. It seems like even though they say they understand what we want done it doesn’t get done that way. Or even if they do, do it the way we want they might damage something else in the process and just laugh it off. Really? Really? How can someone do that? How can someone do that? Whether you are a handyman or a licensed contractor or a friend, why would you and how could you?

Some recent examples:

Our A/C was installed almost a year ago. Well it was leaking and needed to be fixed. We have tried endlessly to get a hold of the company. No one returns our calls. They were so nice when they were here to install it. However, since it has broke not so nice in my point of view. So we had to buy the parts and pay someone else to fix it.

When we had to have a 220 hooked up it was necessary to create another crawl hole in our house. So the gentleman that did that installed the new window/cover. It needed to be painted to match the house. We have several different types of pain in our sheds as we had both the exterior/interior painted not too long ago. He grabbed a can of paint and thought it was the correct color (Navajo white). When I went out to check it out, it was a sand color from one of our rooms. Oops! He said that he would take care of that. That never happened. So again, we had to pay someone else to fix his mistake. Luckily we did have the correct paint for some reason he just didn’t see it.

When the fridge was delivered it was going to be a tight fit width wise. So we waited until the “gentleman” could shave off an area on the cupboard so it would slide in easily. Oh he shaved a piece off of the cupboard. So much that part of the counter top split and broke. But he will take care of that. We are still waiting for that to be taken care of. And he ended up denting our BRAND NEW SAMSUNG FRENCH DOOR FRIDGE. That was a little upsetting to say the least. If ya know what I mean.

We needed to have new fencing done. The redwood fencing is showing its age. So he took a look at everything measured and gave us a price. His price was a decent price. So I bought all of the supplies. He finally got started 3 months later because of reason after reason and then did the picket fence. He still needs to return to straighten it out, shall we say. As for the rest of the 6’privacy fence he realized he measured or “guesstimated” wrong. Ooops!! Are you kidding me? He had me buy 6x6 panels and we should have 6x8 panels. So he loaded them all up and returned them for us. He did that like speedy Gonzales. Let me tell you. He says you can get the 6x8 panels everywhere. Really? Nowhere in California. When we bought the 6x6 panels we bought then when they were on sale. The 6x8 not made in California and SO NOT ON SALE. He tells us not to worry as he going to find them for us. He wanted to be paid for ½ of the fencing job. My mom God love her was going to pay him; until I started throwing a HUGE FREAKING FIT. I tried talking her out of paying him at all or at least not half. She still paid him, not half but still more than what I would have given him. He said he needed the money for his house taxes. SO. And this affects me how? I know I sound like a horrible bitch, right? This is the man that has told us for months, that thinks of us as family. He would NEVER take advantage of us or do us wrong. Really?? I have sent him 2 emails asking for him to come over to fix the fence and the counter top that he trashed. He has NOT responded. Trust me he so does not want me to show up on his doorstep. I don’t care of all of his neighbors are fireman, police man, and FBI people.

Four examples are enough... at least for me they are. If I remember any more I am gonna be way more depressed than I already am.

So do we deserve this? Are we horrible people? Are we too trusting? I am at the point that I no longer give people the benefit of the doubt. Why should I …. I am the one that always end up getting screwed for being the “nice one”.

You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...

2010-09-22T20:51:00.000-07:00

I borrowed this from my cousin for today's post. My father was from the south and we always enjoyed the "redneck" jokes. Hope y'all do to!

1. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...

The finance committee refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier because none of the members knows how to play one.

2. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
People ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish, and what bait was used to catch 'em.

3. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
When the pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering" and five guys and two women stand up.

4. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
Opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday.

5. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if...
A member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of" (Love it!)

6. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
The choir is known as the "OK Chorale".

7. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
In a congregation of 500 members, there are only seven last names in the church directory.

8. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
People think "rapture" is what you get when you lift something too heavy.

9. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
The baptismal pool is a #2 galvanized " Wheeling " washtub.

10. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ....
The choir robes were donated by (and embroidered with the logo from) Billy Bob's Barbecue.

11. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
The collection plates are really hubcaps from a '56 Chevy.

12. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ..
Instead of a bell you are called to service by a duck call.

13. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
The minister and his wife drive matching pickup trucks.

14. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
The communion wine is Boone's Farm "Tickled Pink".

15. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if...
"Thou shall not covet" applies to huntin' dogs, too.

16. You know You're in a Redneck Church if ...
The final words of the benediction are, "Y'all come back now, Ya hear".

God Bless and don't fergit ta say yer prayers...

Oh no not the “C” word

2010-09-18T03:02:00.000-07:00

I was talking to my cousin the other day and we got into a conversation about the dreaded “C” word. You know the one, the one that most women don’t really like to say let alone hear. I happen to be one of “those” women. Well he will sometimes say it. When his wife, Michelle worked at her job, she worked a lot with people in Australia. I guess the “C” word to them is equivalent to the “F” word for us. I had heard that somewhere awhile back but have never been privy to a conversation with someone from down under to experience it! When she first started working with the Australian area it was really shocking to her. I guess within a 15 minute conversation they might use the world a half a dozen times or so. After hearing it so often she basically got used to hearing it. After some time now she has come to use it from time to time.

I think most of us have those times when something happens and it seems when only a curse word will make you feel better. We all have that special word that seems to release the stress. For some it may be F-U-C-K, S-H-I-T, D-A-M-N and for some it may even be C-U-N-T. Micah and his wife from time to time have been known to use that word.

They have 2 beautiful little girls. Need I say more? Hee hee So the other day something happened and Charlie the oldest daughter wanted to use a curse word... well here is how the conversation went.

Charlie: Mommy I want to say a bad word, a curse word, but I don’t want to upset you and Daddy.
Mommy: What is the word Charlie?
Charlie: I don’t even want to say it. I do want to say it because I think it will make me feel better.
Mommy: What letter does the word start with?
Charlie: C
Mommy: Tell you what; how about if I let you say the word now, but then you can never say the word again?
Charlie: I don’t want you or Daddy to be mad at me.
Mommy: Why don’t you go talk to Daddy then?

(Daddy has been listening to this entire conversation) Mom and Dad are both thinking that their daughter want to use “THE C” word.

Charlie: Daddy, I am upset and I want to say a curse word, I think it would make me feel so much better.
Daddy: What is the word?
Charlie: It starts with a C.
Daddy: Well if you really think that it will make you feel better then maybe you should say it. Maybe you should just say it and get it over with. Remember though that if you say it now, you can never say that word again. Do you think you can do that?

My cousin and his wife are both sarcastic smart asses at heart. They are ~~funny~~ hilarious. They are great parents and take wonderful care of their 2 beautiful daughters. My cousin thinks of the “C” word as the mother of all curse words. I would have to agree with him on that one. So when his daughter came to him and told him that she wanted to say a curse word and it started with a C, he was elated. He was so proud of his smart little daughter. Here she is so young, upset and she had the general idea that if you are upset enough saying a curse word is suppose to make you feel better. Meanwhile mommy and daddy are exchanging looks back and forth wondering if they should let her do this or what? If they let her do this then she has said the word and promised to never say it again for the rest of her life. But if they let her do this, will this scar her for the rest of her life?

Charlie: If you and mommy aren’t going to get mad at me then I guess I am ok with saying the word.
Daddy: We won't be mad. We told you that it was ok for you to say it this one time.
DRUM ROLL please.

Charlie: CRAP!

Can I just tell you that my cousin was so disappointed? It was hysterical. As soon as he started telling me the story I knew Charlie wasn’t thinking about “the C” word, at least not the one he was thinking about. Here he was thinking that his daughter was going to make him proud in such a non traditional way. And then…he was so let down. I was laughing so hard…. I almost peed myself.

Outta the mouth of babes…

Remember when?

2010-09-13T00:59:00.000-07:00

The other day I was driving home and saw a father and a daughter taking a walk. She was about 3 years old and oh so cute. He was holding her hand but what struck me was she was walking on the side of the street. I immediately heard my father’s voice in my head, “A true gentleman always walks on the side of the street.” That has always stayed with me. My father always did that with me and my mother. I will never forget when he first told me that.

You just don’t see that much anymore. So of course it got me to thinking and wondering if people teach their children these types of things nowadays. Here are some things that I grew up with as a “staple” in my daily family life. It makes me wonder that if maybe these types of things were instilled upon the children growing up today that maybe, just maybe things might be a bit different.

~We had a family dinner every night. It was rare when we didn’t. It wasn’t something I dreaded either, it was rather nice. (Value = Family time is ~~important~~ priceless)

~My father never cursed in front of us. It was so rare that when a curse word did come out of his mouth, you knew something horrible was about to happen! (Value =A sailor mouth does not make you more of a man)

~My father always opened doors. He opened the car doors, doors to buildings and pulled out your chair for you. (Value = Chivalry is always welcome)

~We always had family conversations. I knew what was going on in the family dynamics. I wasn’t kept in the “dark”, so to speak. We always communicated. They always made me feel as if I was an important part of the family. My opinion mattered. We discussed things before they happened. I was a part of the decision making (to a certain degree). (Value = Communication is fundamental and necessary)

We weren't so caught up with our cell phones, and computers and everything and anyone else. We knew that family was the most important. I learned the most important lessons from my parents, not from school, not the internet, not from friends. My family is who taught me the most important lessons in life. They are the ones that helped me navigate my way through the tough times and have stood by my through it all.

What happened? Where did all of this go? I don't see this anymore. The parents are all caught up on their blackberries and laptops, the kids are texting or sexting or on their computers or Wiis. No one is communicating and no one knows who is doing what. And then the world wonders why the kids do what they do. Parents... WAKE UP... be a family and reconnect and communicate.

I don't understand what parents /families are thinking or are they???

Don’t put a paint brush in Jeff’s hand.

2010-09-09T11:56:00.000-07:00

We have been having some work done around our house. Some much needed work if you ask me. We were also able to get a new stove and new fridge. If you remember in a previous blog I wrote about how nothing is ever easy and we always seem to have obstacles and yet here we go again.

Jeff our angel was over doing some things around the house. This is the retired fire fighter. I will have to tell you all about him another time as he is a great person and has some great stories. He was referred to us through a friend and literally has become a part of our family, an angel if you will. Mom and I really feel blessed to have found him. He reminds us so much of Dad with the quality of his workmanship. You just don’t find that anymore.

When we got the electric stove we had to have a 220 put in. Of course this wasn’t an easy task because we were never told it had to be double grounded and blah blah blah. Like I said thank goodness we have Jeff otherwise we would have been up a creek without a paddle if ya know what I mean. He was able to take care of this. However one of the things he had to do was cut out another opening in our house for a crawl space and work area.

The colors of our house are Navajo White and the trim is a very pale peach. He finally got the screen and door/window done like he wanted so he installed it the other day. We thought we had some left over paint from when we painted the outside of the house (awhile back). I looked but I only found the trim color. After a few minutes he tells me he found it. I was like ok. I was in the house and figured no worries. Mind you he has always told us the one thing he doesn’t like doing is PAINTING. I can hear him outside painting that area. Of course when he is done he wants me to come look at it. So I appease him and go out there to look at it. Right away I notice it is NOT Navajo White. I get right in front of it and take a few steps back and see that it is a color from when we painted the inside of the house. Which is one of the light browns!! I tried not to laugh too loud, but I just couldn’t help myself. I told him that it wasn’t Navajo White. He said sure it is. I pulled him away from the house so he could take a look at it, and while I am pulling him away he is saying once it dries it will match. He looks at it and says, “Oh Fuck, it doesn’t match. You should never put a paintbrush in my hand.” Just so the record is straight here, I never put the paintbrush in his hand. Granted I/we are grateful that he did do this, but I did not make him do this. Don’t you just love the way you always get blamed for something someone else does?

Then he proceeds to tell us, that he thinks he is colorblind! Nice time to mention that to us now bucko! So on the driveway side of our house; we have an area that is a light brownish color. And because he saw some areas in the nearby area he also painted those “scratches” so it is a bit “colorful” on the driveway side I will say. He says he has some Navajo White paint at home. However, since he says he is color blind, I just want to make sure that it really says that color and he is not going by the looks of it.

He said he felt bad about doing that. So then he offered to paint the rest of the house in the “new” color that he did the door/window in. Ummm… yeah, thanks but no thanks.

Wordless Wednesday -A Typical Day at Kitten Rescue's Sanctuary - 2009

2010-09-01T01:19:00.000-07:00

A friend sent this to me in an email and I LOVED it. So of course I had to share it with you's. It was too cute not to.
Enjoy!!

Drool be gone

2010-08-17T11:13:00.000-07:00

I came across this on the Drs.Foster and Smith website and had to check it out. Have you ever seen anything like it before? I know I haven't. I know Bissell makes good products but really? A drool cleaner? I mean can't you just wipe it up? This was too funny not to share it.

It’s just another obstacle right?

2010-08-16T02:41:00.000-07:00

It seems that whenever we do anything (and I do mean anything) we always seem to run into a problem or a bigger mess or an obstacle. Nothing ever seems to go smoothly for us. My father used to say “If it weren’t for bad luck I wouldn’t have any luck at all”. I, being the optimist, would tell him that wasn’t true and remind him of all of the positive things and good things that do happen to him / us as a family. I would name some name, but since they are so far and few between, I can’t really think of any at this moment. All the while in the back of my head kind of wondering if maybe, just maybe he was right. Although I would NEVER tell him that, but I often wondered.

Right now we are doing some “small & easy” home improvements in our home. Please note the key words, small and easy. Now for most people that would be true but for us, not so much. Here is a rundown of some of the “small” obstacles we have come face to face with.

• We finally bought a new fridge. I am SO excited over this you have no idea. There are 2 obstacles that happened with the fridge. The first is that online it tells you that the width of it is 35 5/8 inches. My opening is 36 inches. When the guys came to deliver it, it was 36”. OK... Really? Are you kidding me? Someone has to be pranking me, right? I mean this is a measurement on a Samsung fridge that is on a website that people all over the world use to assist them in choosing the correct appliance. LOVELY!! The fridge could not be put into its place and had to practically be in the middle of the kitchen. UGH! We also needed to have a water line put in because we were still living in the caveman era. This was supposed to be an easy thing to do. Well… it would have except for the fact that once Jeff (our contractor guy) went underneath the house he also discovered that our A/C unit was leaking so badly we basically had a small lake under our house. NOT GOOD. I have been trying to get a hold of our A/C guys and no one is returning my call. The A/C isn’t even a year old. I am beyond words on this one. So because the way the A/C duct is run underneath the house he also needs to cut another entry door on the other side of our house so that he can have easy access to make the water line. An obstacle or a problem??

• We are also getting a new stove, an electric one. We previously had gas but before we purchased this one we checked with someone (who will remain nameless, (clears throat) Jeff) who told us we already had a 220 set up. Woo-hoo! WRONG! No 220… so now we had to buy the parts for that and have Jeff put one in for us. Just an obstacle (he tells me) no worries. My father had put a 220 line right outside so that he could use his tools. Well, after he had been sick we remember him telling us not to use it. We didn’t know why, just not to use it. Jeff thought he was going to be able to use that, as that would be an “easy” fix. Wrong! In fact what Jeff did find was rather scary as all HELL. After my father became ill at times there were “friends” that would offer to help out. With my dad not well and not able to check things you have to believe that people know what they are doing and are doing what they say they are doing. Unfortunately that isn’t always the case. Jeff found out that someone hooked the 220 wire to a 110 plug. That is a major fire hazard. It was a miracle that our house didn’t burn down. Thank you GOD. Thank you Jeff for finding that. An obstacle or a problem??

• The kitchen and the utility room are being re-painted. Why repainted you ask? When we had our house painted back in December, the wonderful man (said with heavy sarcasm) painted our kitchen YELLOW. Now normally yellow for a kitchen is pretty normal, but this yellow is an OMG, scream at you from across the street kind of yellow. Get my drift? I thought so. So we are fixing it and doing the utility room as well. Supposedly this professional painter (I laugh while I say that one) that did our house couldn’t paint our utility room because it was wallpapered and you can’t paint over wallpaper. In case you are wondering, that is so NOT true. So a friend of ours, Tito is painting the rooms and helping out with some other fix it items. When he moved the washer/dryer you will never believe what he found. No no… no dead animals or bugs. Geesh.. I so knew your minds were going. Not in my house anyway!! The dryer duct was not attached correctly. When we bought the dryer it was delivered and installed by Sears. Talk about another fire hazard. We always wondered why we kept having so much dust in the utility room, but didn’t know that was the reason. Thank you God. Thank you Tito for finding it and fixing it. An obstacle or a problem??

• The ceiling fan in my room was dead, well it was on its last round. Jeff was going to install a new one for me with a remote. Normally that would be a quick and easy job. For some reason or another (truthfully I don’t remember what the whole obstacle was) it turned into being a long job. He actually had to build an extra box so that the remote part of it could fit up into the fan on the ceiling. And as for the other ceiling fan in the dining room, Jeff was not able to use the remote at all. BUMMER. Welcome to my world. An obstacle or a problem??

• Last but not least we asked that everything be done by the end of Saturday. We just wanted to have the kitchen/utility room done. The floor, painting, the 220 line and the water line. I know that there were “obstacles” that came up but they told us that it would be done. “No problemo”. And as par for the course it is not… A bit disappointing to say the least. It is just when someone says they are going to do something, I kind of expect that… you know? I surely don’t expect them to go meet someone for another bid when they still haven’t finished this job that was promised to be done by a certain time. Now if there was not a time limit on this it would not be a deal at all, but this was important. Unfortunately both my mom and I get overwhelmed and stressed by things easily. I happen to be going in for a rather important medical treatment on Tuesday and we asked them to have this done so that I could have some time to relax and regroup myself before my treatment. Things never work out the way I would hope or like or expect them to… An obstacle or a problem??

I could list several other items as well, but I think this pretty much gives you an idea of what I am talking about. And I am only talking about the most recent work we are getting done. I won’t even begin to tell you about all of the other “obstacles” that have happened every other time we seem to have something done. We are supposed to get new fencing and I pray that there are NO obstacles for Jeff…or us for that matter.

I have always called them “problems” and Jeff likes to call them “obstacles”. Let me tell you after all of the “problems” or “obstacles” that we have gone through by now I am so OVER it, so exhausted, so tired, so “done” that I just want things to go smoothly. I don’t want a “problem” or an “obstacle”, whether it be big or small. Whether it can be easily fixable or not. I am glad that he can smile and say it is just an obstacle and that it can be fixed and not to worry. I wish I could too. An obstacle or a problem??

Get Fuzzy - Satchel finally comes out ahead

2010-08-15T18:28:00.000-07:00

Not sure if anyone reads the comic strip Get Fuzzy but it is my FAVORITE comic. I have followed it for years. In fact I really think that these two are in a way related to my two. Bucky would be Chip -(my male black and white kitty as he basically runs the house) and Satchel would be my Tee-Tee, granted mine is a little brown girl but she is so much like Satchel, (as they are both nervous, and both like to wear jewelry (his-watch, she -necklaces)).

Many times I have read this strip and looked at my "kids" and said, "Gee, sound familiar, guys?" I know it does to them, because it sure does to me! It almost always brings a smile to my face if not make me laugh out loud. I had to share this one because like I said Satchel actually comes out ahead in this one, which is rare. I do have to admit... I am worried about what will happen to him on Monday!

Not sure why I am unable to get the entire comic to show but if you click on the comic you will be able to see it full size.

America's Got Talent and then some...

2010-08-14T23:54:00.000-07:00

So I tried to do this post after the show first aired but leave it to me to have a problem. So here is the post now....better later than never, right??
Not sure if anyone watches America's Got Talent or not but I have been watching it this season. They have some pretty good acts. Last night were the YouTube auditions. Now I didn't go online and check those out and vote for any of those but there were 12 (I think) that made it to the show and then from there we get to vote and the top 4 move on to the finals.

Everyone is talking about the 10 year old girl, Jackie that sings like an angel. Trust me she does. It gave me goosebumps! Even if for some reason she doesn't win this contest she will make it big, there is NO doubt in my mind.

Then there was this guy, Dan Sperry, a magician. He was AWESOME. Not only was he ~~good~~ great, he had an element of surprise and humor. Humorous because Howie Mandel(one of the judges) is a germaphobe. I get the whole germ thing, but it is still be funny even if it is at his expense. And you will see at the end of his audition, what I am talking about. Hysterically so!

Do you think these are good acts? Do you think these should make it to the finals? Would love to hear what you think and feel about these 2 among some of the other acts.

Death warmed over

2010-08-12T01:38:00.000-07:00

A week ago Tuesday I had a new infusion scheduled. I read all of the pros and cons for this new “miracle” drug. For this one there are many things to think about. On all of the other infusions that I have tried over the year(s) I have never really been worried or concerned. This one I was, no questions. In fact this one even warned that it was known to have fatal reactions from the 1st infusion. Scary. Right. I think so even if you don’t!
So this time I actually decided to have someone drive me to and from. Yes, I know, normally I drive myself and think nothing of it. I know I know… FREAK. But hey we already know that so we won’t linger on that subject!

This particular infusion takes 4 -6 hours. Nice, eh? And to think they don’t even offer entertainment at my doctor’s office!! I finally get all set up. First I have to get an IV push of Benadryl, IV push of Decadron (this stings and burns like CRAZY in case you were wondering) and some Tylenol. This has to all be given to me 30 minutes prior to my infusion. After waiting 30 minutes and taking my vitals, it seems I am still breathing and all is well. So they start the infusion. Not long into it, I start showing some signs. Signs you ask? First I start itching, show a bright rash all over my face, neck, chest and shoulders and welts all over my head. They say that is a normal reaction. Oh good… I feel so much better now. But wait…. I can’t just be like everyone else. Oh no, not me. Before you know it, I am freezing. I mean I am so cold, I have 2 blankets on me and I am still shaking. Then my head starts pounding and all of a sudden I can barely swallow. You know when you start to get a sore throat and it itches way down in your throat and you can’t itch it? That is what my throat and ears felt like. Yet at the same time, I am having seriously difficult time breathing. And my body… talk about pain… I have NEVER felt such horrible pain in my life. I hurt in places that I didn’t know could hurt that bad. So the nurse came in to check on me and asked how I was doing. So I told her and she turned on the light….and then her eyes got really BIG. So she obviously wasn’t going to hide what she saw. My face was swollen; my eyes were almost swollen shut. I thought I felt something but I didn’t realize it was THAT BAD. Guess I scared her. She ran out of the room (poor little old Korean nurse) to get the Doctor. He came in with another nurse. They started poking and prodding. I often wonder if they think they are really going to discover anything when they do that, because let’s face it they NEVER do. Anyway, he advises them to give me another dose of Decadron and slow the infusion rate down. Lovely. So this will mean it will take longer. And yet still no entertainment. Now they bring in heat packs to lay over me and try and warm me up and coffee for my throat. I don’t drink tea so I guess they felt coffee was the next best thing.

Thank goodness I didn’t have to drive myself home… let me tell you I would have been trying to figure out who I could have called to come pick me up.
Let’s just say the rest of the day and the next day I was pretty sure I was dying. I was beyond exhausted. I was so tired it was scary. I figured it was slow, horrible death. I was suffering for everything, you know all those little things we all do and say we will pay for later… well I figured now was my time to pay. Any white lies (btw I have never told one of those (oops there goes another white lie)), office supplies that were “borrowed” , or stories that might have been embellished just a tad bit, I just knew I was paying for everything and then some.

Thursday (2 days later) I woke up and was like a different person. Granted I was still exhausted but my pain was almost gone. I know. Did you hear that? Almost gone. I almost had no pain. It was so surreal. I almost didn’t believe it. I was in shock. I was so excited. I kept thinking OH MY GOD what if this is THE one. What if this is the one that helps me. All of this time and finally we have found it. OH MY GOD. I wasn’t completely pain free but the amount that I did have I was totally ok with, in my mind it wasn’t even worth complaining about. I was exhausted but almost NO PAIN. Can you tell I was THRILLED?

I will take whatever I can get… it was very short lived. It lasted a few hours. I have hope that with my next infusion (8/17) the side effects will not be as bad and I will have a longer “pain free” time. Trying to stay positive. Hopefully my “death warmed over state” won’t last too long this time.

Swan Lake

2010-08-11T00:37:00.000-07:00

I have never seen anything like this before. Thought I would share. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Fire in the hole!

2010-08-08T00:32:00.000-07:00

We are in the middle of making some minor home improvements. Our house is 21 years old. I never in a million years thought I would live in one house that long. Growing up we always moved around so much it just seemed like the norm. We are getting a new electric stove and a new refrigerator.

Our new(soon to be delivered) electric stove

The beautiful Samsung 29 cu ft French door fridge w/ water & ice on door (2nd ice in freezer!)

I am SO excited about the fridge. Why?? The fridge is a 29 cu ft French door with a water and ice maker ON the DOOR. Now you have to understand I have NEVER had a fridge with a water and ice maker ON the DOOR (OK I did for a short span of 10 months while I was married, but that is an entirely different blog, if ya know what I mean).

We are selling our old fridge and stove for a really really cheap price. Surprisingly someone has bought both fridges (yes we were one of those families that had 2 fridges) and the old stove. Yeah for us. So when our friend came over to get the fridge the 2 guys that we had here working were nice enough (maybe because I begged hee hee) to help take the fridge outside and load it up on their truck. It didn’t take long. As we were walking back to the front door, all you could smell was FIRE and there was so much smoke it was crazy. Thank goodness, one of the guys that are working is a retired fireman.

Our kitchen on fire (OK..maybe this is a slight exaggeration, but just slight)

The Kitchen was on FIRE! YUP!! That is right. Remember I said the stove was OLD? Well when the guys were taking the fridge out they must have accidentally hit one of the knobs. They turn on rather easily. No one seemed to notice this…until we saw flames coming from the kitchen. Jeff (retired fireman) was working on the cupboards above the stove and had a blanket on top of the stove in case anything fell so it wouldn’t damage the stove. Tito was also painting in that area. Apparently when the knob got turned on, it didn’t take much time at all, to light that blanket and the paint tray.

The house filled up so quick it was amazing. The stove looked like it was ruined! Amazingly it is not. Jeff took the range top off and went in the backyard and scrubbed his little heart out and it ended up looking like a brand new stove! Jeff said to me, “you know the next time you want your stove cleaned, just ask me, and don’t start a fire to get me to clean your stove!!” He thinks he is so funny. I assured him that once we get our new stove I won’t start it on fire; I will just call him to come clean it!! LOL

Goodbye my sweet little Chip

2010-08-01T19:36:00.000-07:00

Chip

May 21, 1998 – July 26, 2010

It took me almost a week to get myself together enough to try to compose a blog or at least a resemblance of one.

The day started out pretty normal. Chip hadn’t been feeling all that great but it wasn’t anything that I was “seriously worried” about. I pretty much figured like most of the other times, Tracy would be able to fix him. I called his fabulous Vet (Tracy) and told them he was still not feeling well. I explained to them that he had now stopped eating, and was going both ends. It even seemed like his arthritis was a bit worse, but then it could have been just me. You know how mom’s hate to see their children sick. So since they are a great clinic they fit us in that night at 6pm. I felt that we were lucky to be squeezed in. Somehow he figured it out and at the last minute got underneath one of the beds. I figured this was a no win situation. Usually there is no way in ~~the world~~ HELL would be able to get him out. No amount of food, prodding, begging, nothing will get him out. Well, I am not even sure but we got him out. Strange… an omen I say.

Off to the clinic we went. We were taken right in, which is strange for having been fit in. I was ok with this. We waited but he was fine. Chip likes walking around in the exam rooms. He is pretty calm there, I guess because he is so used to being there, he knows the surroundings and the people so he is not so uncomfortable, which I am thrilled about. All of the peeps that are there are GREAT people and are good to both of us.

So Tracy (Dr. McFarland) comes in, and we she checks him out. We she reviews his chart. It hasn’t been that long ago that he had his thyroid removed. Yet he still had issues. We still had to have him on thyroid meds, now his heart was galloping; his swallowing was becoming an issue. I could go on. This was a little guy that basically from the moment I chose him I knew I was saving his life. He was known as the ‘Million Dollar Kitty’. Within the first year of his life we she had to do a colon surgery (I can’t even begin to think on how to spell the correct name for the surgery at this time). Chip seemed to have stomach issues, and then we found he started having seizures, and arthritic, and then thyroid issues. This poor little guy has been fighting his whole life. I thought for sure when we came in there, that Tracy would review everything and we she would figure it out, fix him and we would come home and all would be peachy in our household again.

The more we kept talking the more options we kept running out of. And then she saw it. He got up and moved. Normally when we would come in for a visit, he would put on his “MANCAT” attitude and he never let her see him limp or walk with any sense of pain. Even though I told her, she never saw it firsthand. Well… let me tell you when she saw it firsthand, she cried and realized that she was not able to fix this unfortunately. We ~~talked~~ cried some more. I called my mom (Chip’s grandma) so that she could talk to him one last time and say goodbye. Since we hadn’t even had this in our thought process we weren’t there.

Tracy came back and we started the procedure. I won’t go into details. All I will say is that he was ready. I am glad he will not be hurting anymore. He will now be able to eat whatever he wants and not have to worry about gaining weight (thyroid issue), he will no longer have seizures, he can chase and bully as many dogs as he wants (he enjoyed doing that to his sister, Tee-Tee). I am pretty sure he will see his Grandpa, and his older brother (Thums, even though they never met, he heard a lot about him), and his Nana (my grandma). I told him to tell everyone hello and we love them.

I have had to leave him there before for surgeries and it never bothered me as I trusted everyone. Course I was one of the only ones that would come and visit him 1-2 times a day while he was there. But tonight, tonight was different. It was sooo very difficult to leave him. It was like if I didn’t leave him, then he wasn’t gone. I know it doesn’t make any sense, but that is what I felt. I knew it wasn’t true, but it was so hard to leave him. I knew Tracy would take very good care of him. I had no doubt in my mind or heart of hearts it was just one of the hardest things I have ever had to do.

I had originally wanted to have some pics of him from when he was just an itty bitty baby…but those pictures are not digital (i.e. on the computer) so that would mean I have to go through boxes of pictures and I am sorry but I am just not ready to do that. I still have several of his things here and I think about him daily.

We are getting him cremated and we will have him with us at home…where he belongs.

He was dressed up as a Piggy for Halloween one year.

I just thought he looked so regal.

Chip- Up close & personal. This was one of my first pictures that I took when I got my new camera (then) He was my model.

Chip waiting "in line" to be fed. It was funny with him and his sister!

Here is a full length of my baby. He came to me barely weighing 2 lbs now almost 20lbs.

His last day... sweet dreams... see you soon.
I love you

I walk among you

2010-07-24T12:36:00.000-07:00

I walk among you. I blend in easily and no one knows any different… except for me. I look like everyone else, 2 arms, 2 legs, 2 eyes. No outside deformities. I don’t walk with a limp, or need to use a cane, walker or wheelchair (at least not yet). I wear no braces or casts. I have no burns, scars or malformations that make me stand out. Like I said to look at me… I look like you or the person next to you. But what about on the inside?

Just because a person “looks” ok on the outside doesn’t necessarily mean the person is. To the average person it does, but to the person that suffers from “invisible illnesses” it is an entirely different story. I sometimes think maybe I should wear a sign that lets people know that I am not 100% but then most of the time I am the one that doesn’t want people to know that I am not 100% in the first damn place! It is a catch 22, I tell ya.

I have a handicap placard. I use it when I need to. I use it on those days when I know I can’t do those extra steps. It took me a long time to come to terms with first getting it, having it and then actually using it! It may sound strange, but I still have problems using it. Like I said, for the most part I look "OK", so when people see a 38 yr old get out of a SUV and she doesn’t get into a wheelchair or use a cane or walker, the looks come tenfold! It used to bother me a lot more than it does now; now I just flash them a really big smile. If they say anything, then I do tend to open my big mouth. I just can’t help myself sometimes.

Since I do walk among you and seem to "fit” in no one knows that inside I am exhausted. I am forcing myself to take the steps that I am taking, I am pushing myself to finish my task, pushing myself to make it back to my car before I collapse in front of anyone (God forbid). I try not to have to hold anything so that anyone can see how my hands tremble and shake. It seems as the time goes on they are getting worse. My tremors are growing increasingly worse and they are now taking over more and more of my body, not just my hands. It started out just my right hand, not that way anymore.

If I need to talk I plan my words carefully so that I can hopefully be able to have them all in my mind and not have a problem so I can’t find my words and be stuck wordless. Now that is complete humility. Everyone seems to make “jokes” about forgetting a word or “we all lose track of what we are saying”, when in reality I have a real issue with this. Not only can I not find my words, but sometimes even if you say the word I was looking for, for some reason I can’t get it out. For nothing in this damn world. . It is almost like I am stuttering but I am not. I used to be such a gabber too, not so much anymore.

Just because everyone looks “ok” does not mean there isn’t something more going on. Just because you don’t need a cane, walker, or wheelchair doesn’t mean you might not need assistance for something. As much as I hate to ask for help, sometimes if you just stop and take a look you might be able to see the signs yourself. Just a thought you might want to entertain.

I walk among you. I see you for who you are. But do you see me?

The Bounty Hunter ~ movie review

2010-07-20T00:59:00.000-07:00

Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler star in this comedy that keeps you laughing and interested throughout the movie. I am really not sure why this movie didn’t do better at the box office. It was full of action (and not the kind that was so unreal you kept saying to yourself, oh yeah right like that could ever happen!! I mean I hate those movies.), humor and a bit of “who done it”. There wasn’t a lot of cussing (now that I think about it) and really there was no sex…oh now I know why it didn’t do well at the box office. DUH!! Funny how sometimes it takes a moment for you to hear what you are saying before you realize OH!! Now that I have that figured out, I feel so much better.

I found it to be a very cute, fun movie to watch. It takes place in the NY /NJ area. Gerard plays a cop turned Bounty Hunter while his (ex) wife, Jennifer plays a Daily News reporter who happens to skip bail on accident. So without giving too much away the chase is on. Of course there is more to the plot but I don’t want to spoil it for ya!!

SPAM

2010-07-19T02:48:00.000-07:00

SPAM

No no not that kind of Spam! Although to be truthful when I do hear the word Spam that is the first thing that comes to mind. I have never really liked that stuff, do you? I hear it is a big thing in Hawaii, however any of the times I was over there; I don’t ever remember seeing it on any menus, but maybe because I wasn’t really looking for it. However, growing up, I remember it being a staple in our home, because my father grew up on it. He loved the stuff (while I would silently gag). I can remember opening the can and seeing the meat and all that jelly stuff and then it would happen… gagging almost to the point of no return! I know awful huh? I just couldn’t control it. I could make it for him but I couldn’t eat it. UCK!! It still makes my stomach a little queasy. I could never get over the site of the meat with all that gel/jelly stuff. (Gagging)

Geesh…almost got off of the topic. It is a good thing I don’t do that, just think of how crazy this post could have ended up being. Good thing I always stay on track.

My thought process was Spam… Spammers… WTF! Do you guys have any issues with this stuff? I mean I am sure you get tons of spam email. But I am talking about on your blog. I seem to have gotten a following from the Chinese. I don’t have a problem with that at all… but could you please write it in ENGLISH? Could you please write at least something? I get these comments and either they are blank or their comments are written in Chinese or there are just a bunch of symbols. You can’t possibly tell me that they are actually reading my blog. I mean I guess you could tell me they are reading my blog, but I don’t think I would believe you. I know that I can go in and delete the comments, which I do. I am just kind of curious as to how they found my blog. Why would they want to “spam” my blog with these strange comments or symbol? I guess I was just wondering if you get that type of spam and what do you do?

WHIP IT ~ another movie review

2010-07-18T01:32:00.000-07:00

Have you heard of this movie? I don’t even remember seeing this movie advertised. Then again, don’t quote me on that either. The last time we watched a Netflix movie one of the movies it advertised was Whip It. It caught my eye, and I put it in the queue. So glad I did.

This movie was directed by Drew Barrymore. I don’t know about you, but I have always liked her. She is full of piss and vinegar and very smart. She also played a part in this movie. This movie is about a young girl trying to find her way and in that process falls in love with Roller Derby. Maybe I found it to be so much fun because I have always (secretly) wanted to be a Roller Derby Chic! Ha ha… I know get your laughs out now. Could you imagine me on the track? To think years ago, I practically lived at the rink. I loved it and thought I would always skate. Ok... back to the movie.

The main character is played by Ellen Page; she became big after her role in Juno (I am assuming you all have seen this one, if not… watch it!). She was also in another movie, Homeless to Harvard. If you like true stories, this a great one. Although she does not play the main character, it still is a great movie.

There are actually a lot of well known people in this flick. Drew Barrymore, Ellen Page, Marcia Gay Harden, Juliette Lewis, Eve, and Jimmy Fallon are all in this movie. Jimmy is almost unrecognizable. He has one of those voices that you can place anywhere and since he is the announcer at the derby, he makes his character well known. I have always gotten a chuckle out of the great “names” that the derby girls have, and in this movie they are just as good.

This movie is almost a coming of age for a young 17 yr old girl and her family as well. This is placed in the south with all of the traditional “southern belle” expectations and Bliss (the main character) throws that all out the window and she does it so wonderfully.

Hope you get a chance to watch this movie as well. Would love to hear what you think of it as well.

PUMP me up or S-T-R-E-T-C-H me out

2010-07-11T01:33:00.000-07:00

I was flipping through a catalog and came across this. They call it Neck Magic Air Cushion

Are you kidding me? I mean I suffer from headaches and migraines. I have tried a never ending list of suggestions to help with them. I think I am pretty open to trying new things especially if it will mean that it will relieve my pain. But come one, are you serious???

“Ease tension headaches and pinched nerves” that is what it claims to do. Did you see that picture? It looks like some ancient torture contraption. I want to know who in their right minds signed up to “try” this out so that it would be approved to be sold in the good ole USA.

Crazy Heart sadly disappointed me

2010-07-09T01:43:00.000-07:00

Truthfully I don’t even remember when this movie was out in the theatres. But when the awards came around this movie was all the talk. I like the actors that were in this movie. There was Jeff Bridges, who won for Best Actor, Robert Duvall, Maggie Gyllenhaal and Colin Farrell. After all of the hoopla, I checked it out and thought it would be a pretty good watch. I mean I like country music (yes I am one of “those” people) and it seemed like a good story with great actors.

OK so am I only the one that didn’t find this movie to be one of the best movies of this year? Oh wait, no, my mother didn’t either, she counts right?

The movie started out very slow and I kept thinking it was going to pick up and start getting interesting…it never happened. Granted there were some good parts but they were small and very few and far between. You basically could tell what was going to happen before it did. There wasn’t much excitement or thrill in this movie. The ending was even more disappointing.

I am glad I didn’t waste the money on seeing it in the theatres. However, to me it was still a waste of my time to watch it.

Have you seen the movie? What were your thoughts on it?

Vampires

2010-07-08T02:42:00.000-07:00

It seems that all you hear lately is talk about Twilight and Vampires. I guess with the release of the latest Twilight movie I can understand the fascination. But of course this got me thinking about Vampires and all. They make it out like all of them are horrible people. I know they are not. I am sure everyone knows at least one Vampire if not more.

We know a few, but are really good friends with one. Her name is Bonita. She looks like any of us do. She is even married with 3 beautiful children. Her husband works and her children all go to school/college. She owns a nice home and drives a minivan. She enjoys shopping and getting out and doing things. She is very warm and inviting. She is smart and comedic. She comes to our house at least once a week and sometimes more. It never seems like we have enough time with her. The time always flies by so fast when she is here.

Her need for blood is not a problem for us. She has been open about this “need” from the beginning. I am sure you don’t mind doing things for your friends, right? I mean the way we look at it we are friends and she does things for us. Friendship is a give and take kind of thing anyway.

I am sure you all are dying to see what she looks like. I have feeling you are thinking that you just can’t imagine that you would know a ”Vampire”.

Ok...so maybe I left out that she is actually a phlebotomist! But to me in my mind, that is just like a Vampire. I mean that is what I call them. What do you call them?

Can you point me to the exchange department please?

2010-07-06T00:19:00.000-07:00

I was the strange kid that always said I knew (in a roundabout way) ahead of time what my life was going to be like. I have always ~~felt~~ known that I picked my family. I know that may sound strange to some of you… but it is true. Truth be told I honestly don’t remember it to be exactly like this. I am guessing I must have forgotten some things or pushed the not so fun filled thoughts out of my mind. I remember picking my parents out, and knowing that I would have some sort of illness, but not to this degree.

So I am here asking if anyone would be so kind as to point me in the right direction to the exchange dept. Heck I would be thrilled with a Pick-A-Part . Don’t get me wrong I would never trade my parents (not to say they have never driven me up a wall at times), but this whole health issue for both my mom and I … well I am pretty over it.

My mom is 63 and I am in my 30’s (cough cough), 38, so I think we have dealt with all of our health issues long enough. I would love to say that we would like to be overhauled completely, but I am pretty sure they are not doing that as of yet. However, if you happen to know of a place that is, by all means do let me know! I am hoping that will happen soon, at least in my lifetime.

I am not looking for cosmetic procedures; I am looking for necessary procedures.

Like for Mom – It would be great if both of her knees could get back to working order to where there are no complications anymore, along with her back. Even better, have her lungs back at 100% or at least 80% and then she wouldn’t need the oxygen. While we are there, can we fix all of her innards that seem to be bothering her too? I mean if we are going to do this, we might as well do it right. So let’s just get all new ones, better safe than sorry. Last but certainly not least, is there any way we can take all of her pain away? Now that would be AWESOME.

For Me- I would ask for no pain as well. I would ask to have my balance back and no more tremors. Most of all, I would ask for a new brain (no more migraines that last weeks at a time, my memory and speech to be back to the way it was before my illness). A new stomach so I don’t end up sick every other day and unable to leave the house, because let me tell you that is always so much fun (NOT!). A new heart would be good, since I have already had a heart attack. Oh... I know what about new skin, I always loved being able to be in the sun. Now I can’t even drive in my car without 55 SPF and I still get sunburned. I am not asking to be able to go back to my high school days and be the sun goddess I was, just so that I can walk from my door to my mailbox and not get fried, that would be nice.

At times ~~I think~~ I would love to trade my life… but realistically I wouldn’t be who I am today if I hadn’t gone through everything I had. It still makes the whole “illness” and “sick” thing get old. No matter how I look at it and try and deal with it, it just does.

For now, I will stick it out, because that is what I do. I will keep my eyes open for the Pick –a-Part of body organs/limbs and hopefully I will luck out!!

Ran out of steam

2010-07-05T02:45:00.000-07:00

I had to do a few errands today. I was feeling “ok”. For some reason for the last few days my tremors have been pretty bad, especially my right side. It has been hard for me to write or hold almost anything. My writing and signature is practically non-existent. It seems that I after I do one or two things I am so darn week. What is up with that? Whatever it is, I DON’T like it.

I didn’t go nuts with doing my hair and make-up because I knew that would have drained me. I was ok but I knew I was running on reserves. I got ready and off I went. I needed to go to the Cat Dr. to pick up food for my cat, Chip, then to the pharmacy to pick up meds for mom and finally I wanted to ~~run into~~ pick up a few things at the grocery store. It was rather warm out today (100 degrees) so I knew that would affect me as well. Trust me I have a/c in my vehicle and I am NOT afraid to use it.

These places are all pretty close in distance. I could feel that with each stop I was getting weaker. At the pharmacy and the grocery store my shakes were so bad I felt like the cashiers were staring at me like I was a drugee that needed a fix. I hate that.

As I am in the grocery store, I haven’t even finished and I am really having a hard time. My shakes are increasing, I am getting hot, flushed, and weak and my body pain is starting to go through the roof. What is going on here? This shouldn’t be happening. I should be able to do all of this and more with no problem. Right? Right? (You are agreeing with me here, right???) I actually had to stop several times throughout the grocery store and take breaks to rest so that I could continue. I felt like the shopping trip took me all day. Granted it didn’t but I felt like I was there for a week. I swear I saw shift change while I was there. I checked out and had to ask for help. I knew there was just no way in HELL I was going to be able to push this cart to my car and then load it into my car. Isn’t that horrible? No you say, because I wasn’t feeling well or because I have an illness. I am still having a hard time with this. Thank God I don’t like far from the store.

I arrived home and now I needed to bring the groceries in. I don’t have a long driveway but when you don’t feel well it seems like a runway! I have a red wagon that I use to load up the groceries and take them to the door. Then I have to bring them up 5 stairs to get into the house. I had about a ~~million~~ 3 trips to get everything inside. I put all of the cold things away. I changed into something comfortable and I just had to rest. I ~~lay down~~ collapsed on the couch and literally could NOT MOVE. I was there for an hour and was wondering when I would be able to move.

I knew I had to move when Tee-Tee was staring at me like she was starving to death and if I didn’t feed her right then she might pass out, and Chip was meowing so loudly I am pretty sure you all heard him. So I proceeded to drag my ass off of the couch and fix them dinner and then us dinner as well.

So it hit me while I was in the grocery store that I am really going through a bad flare. I can’t even do a full grocery shopping trip without just about killing myself. I keep telling myself this is just temporary. I am hoping this temporary is going to be done with real soon.

This SUCKS!

Happy 4th of July

2010-07-04T00:33:00.000-07:00

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY

THE FOURTH

CRASH!

BASH!

it's a

BANG!

the

ZANG!

Fourth

WHOOSH!

BAROOOM!

July

WHEW!

by Shel Silverstein

What’s in an apology?

2010-07-02T00:37:00.000-07:00

I am sorry… really? I wonder if people really know how to apologize correctly. I never really gave that much thought about it before but lately I have.

So I decided to look it up in the dictionary and see what it had to say.

In the Webster’s Dictionary:
Main Entry: apol•o•gy
Pronunciation: \ə-ˈpä-lə-jē\
Function: noun
Date: 1533

1 a: a formal justification: DEFENSE b: EXCUSE 2a
2: an admission of error or discourtesy accompanied by an expression of regret a public apology
3: a poor substitute: MAKESHIFT

Synonyms APOLOGY, APOLOGIA, EXCUSE, PLEA, PRETEXT, ALIBI mean matter offered in explanation or defense. APOLOGY usually applies to an expression of regret for a mistake or wrong with implied admission of guilt or fault and with or without reference to mitigating or extenuating circumstances said by way of apology that he would have met them if he could.

I don’t know about you but if I am going to apologize I am going to say it like I mean it. I am going to apologize and not make an excuse after the fact that will make it ok for what I have done. That is NOT an APOLOGY.

For example:

He says: I am sorry for what I said, but I really want you to know that you still are over reacting to this whole situation.

That is not an apology. That is saying you are sorry because you feel you should or need to smooth things over but you are still letting the other person that they did something wrong too (whether or not they did).

He says: I am sorry that you feel that way.

Again not a true apology. I call this one my psych apology. I learned this one many years ago. This you say to someone to diffuse the situation and it makes it seem as if you are apologizing but in reality you are simply telling them that you feel bad for the way they feel, but not for what you did to make them feel that way. It is a sneaky way to get around an apology. Depending on the situation this one does come in handy and does work rather well.

I started thinking about this for 2 reasons, 1) I have a habit (a bad one I am told) that I say “I am sorry” all of the time. I guess I do. I apologize for everything and anything (so I am told). I apologize when I am sick, when someone else is sick, when something goes wrong that I have NOTHING to do with, when it is too hot, or too cold (get the idea?) 2) a friend of mine really hurt and upset me yesterday and today when we spoke the apology that was given was NOT an apology. I was like REALLY? This is it? Although I know for a fact that that person does not read my blog (that is whole other story) so I know that this won’t end up as a “hint”. LOL

The next time you need to apologize for something that you truly do mean, I hope you make it as sincere as possible, if not, the other person can tell trust me on that one. And if you are going to apologize just too smooth things over make sure you use the “psych apology”.

How do you apologize or do you?

Do you apologize for everything like I do?

Movie review - Old Dogs

2010-07-01T00:00:00.000-07:00

I belong to Netflix because let’s face it; I hardly ever get to see a movie in the theatre. I am ok with that, well I mean kind of anyway. Truth be told I do believe it is highway robbery what they charge to see a movie in the theatre now. I mean matinee is a cheap (note the sarcasm in my voice) $9.50 and after that it goes up to $11.00 (Sun-Thurs) and $11.50 (Fri & Sat). Because don’t you know if they didn’t raise it that 50 cents they would probably go out of business. Ok... sorry about that… started getting off on another subject… and we all know how I never (cough cough) do that.

Ok... so we put Old Dogs in the queue and when it arrived we were pleasantly surprised. They say laughter is the best medicine. The rating scale on Netflix is a 5 star scale, and I would gladly give it a 10. I don’t understand why it didn’t have more press. It was a REALLY GOOD MOVIE. It had great actors. I mean come, John Travolta, right there that should tell ya something, I mean right? If you don’t like yourself some John, that what are you thinking? Then there was Robin Williams and he is always funny, and with this being a family movie he wasn’t all vulgar (you know like I can be sometimes). Kelly Preston, Rita Wilson, Matt Dillon and Seth Green are just a few more of the well known actors that are in this great movie.

Needless to say we laughed so hard that at times we had to pause it as I was afraid my mom was going to have issues with her breathing. She is on oxygen 24/7. But it was such a good laugh. We laughed till we cried, till we were blue in the face (sorry not pics of that one!). We laughed until it hurt, but this time it was good hurt! This is one of those movies that I would definitely spend the money and even at full price to purchase to have in my collection to be able to watch again and to share with others.

They did an excellent job on this movie. I cannot say enough nice things about this. I believe it was not given enough press or media as it should have done so much better in the theatres and awards.

If you haven’t already seen it for yourself, here is a clip. I hope after seeing this it will make you want to at least rent it to check it out. Let me know what your rating is.

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

2010-06-30T00:34:00.000-07:00

Chip sporting a rather cute "hat". This is actually a top to one of his newest treats that Daisy highly recommends. I will write more about these yummy treats soon.

Who needs toes and fingers??

2010-06-29T01:07:00.000-07:00

Who needs fingers and toes? Obviously I don’t. When I was young I was known to ~~occasionally~~ on a pretty regular basis ~~get my fingers caught in something~~ smash my fingers. Trust me it is not like I tried. It seemed that if there was a sliding glass door around, it had my name all over it. In fact both of my thumb nails actually have grooves and ridges in them because of getting caught on so many different occasions. Those are just the times in the sliding glass doors; I am not even going to mention the car doors.

I thought I had grown out of that stage. Apparently not. This week alone, OK, in the last few days I have managed to slam 3 of my fingers in either a door or a drawer. Amazingly I still have all 10 fingers…for now that is. My toes seem to be following the lead from my fingers for some reason. Anyone have any reason as to why they think this might be happening?

About 2 years ago, I took my Godson to Toys R Us and wouldn’t you know it my big toe got smashed in the sliding glass doors at that place. Lovely eh? At first I thought it was OK. It wasn’t bleeding, it was throbbing and screaming at me, but this was his first trip there and I wanted it to be special. So I was walking along and all of a sudden a pregnant lady has the most horrified look on her face and pointing at my foot. Ok…at this time, my entire foot was covered in blood, and I had a trail following me. Would you believe that no store employees or any other guests noticed this? Anyway, I calmed her down and told her I was fine and tried to make sure she was OK too. The last thing I wanted was for something to happen to her because of my toe nail. Anyway I couldn’t get it to stop bleeding and I had to go to urgent care. The nail had to eventually be removed and it took 4 months for it to completely grow back in and be A OK. Just to let everyone know, my nails have always been very thin. I was born without any nails... so I basically don’t have a fighting chance here.

This week I have run into so many things I have lost count. I have re injured the infamous big toe, and lost most of that nail, as it was just ripped off in what I got it stuck in. Oh wait I remember, I actually did something fun and went four wheeling and was lucky enough to lose that nail. Since then I have walked into things or whatever and for some reason hit it so hard that I managed to damage the nail to the point of it either ripping off or hanging on for dear life. Let’s see I have done that to about 3 other nails.

Granted this is NOT my foot, but you get the idea, right? Oh wait.. there is only 1 toe bandaged, I would several more between both of my feet!

Again, not my hand but at this point most of my fingers would be bandaged. I just wanted to give you a visual.

Ok.. this is my foot (after the first OMG toe injury at Toys R Us and before this week's tragedies)

I always enjoyed getting pedicures and at this point I am going to need acrylics put on if I am going to be able to get a pedicure anytime soon. At this rate if I keep this up, I won’t have any toe or finger nails. Hmm... did we decide if we really do need them or are they just a fashion accessory?

A new person...

2010-06-28T00:56:00.000-07:00

So I had decided to try (note the operative word) and let my hair grow out. Several years back my hair was down to the middle of my back, and before that it was to my behind! A few years ago I decided I needed a change and basically chopped it all off. I really liked it. I tend to get bored easily so I wanted a change. I thought I would try for an all one length bob. I soon realized I must have been NUTS. I mean what was I thinking I always have some sort of "fullness" in my hair and we all know that with one length fullness is not going to happen! It was nice for awhile, a different look, I could pull the sides up, put it all in a ponytail, and you get the idea. Well before you know it, I was ALWAYS putting it in a pony tail. BORING!! Then I remembered one of the main reasons I cut my really long hair was because it was so heavy it caused me to have headaches, and here with the pony tails it was happening again, not to mention the fact that I was sweating even more!! YUCK !

Today was the day...I cut it all off. OMG!! It was awesome. It was liberating! I never would have thought a haircut could do that. I felt transformed - like a new person!!

It must show all over- because in the short time that I was out after my haircut, I was complimented on my smile (I didn't think that had changed!) And on my top (which is really nothing special). Although he said the color was a good choice for me he was looking more at the girls now that I think about it. Ok so that one doesn’t count.

So here are some before and after shots….

What do you think?

Which one do you like better?

Here I am with longer hair. This is not the longest I have had it but it is to the middle of my back in this picture.

Here my hair is almost all one length bob. It still has layers but at this point I was pretty much pulling it back because it was easier and I was so darn hot all the time.

Here I am with my short hair. Granted this is not a recent photo, but this is how I just had it cut again.

KFC not a quick choice

2010-06-12T02:29:00.000-07:00

I decided to pick up KFC yesterday for dinner. As I thought that if I went through the drive thru that would mean a quick meal and be on my way home to throw it together. I guess it wasn’t meant to be, that is a quick meal. I go through the drive thru and am told that the roasted chicken won’t be done for another 4 minutes, and asks if I want to wait. Yes I tell them and am asked to park up front and wait. I chuckle and ask them to try not to forget about me, as that had happened one other time before. The young lady in the drive thru assures me that she won’t let that happen.

After waiting 15 minutes I decide I should go inside and see what the status is. I go in and it takes quite a while for the cashier to acknowledge me. The drive thru girl comes over and apologizes and says it is all her fault. She tells me that when they told her it would only be 4 minutes until the roasted chicken would be ready what they didn’t tell her was that they were only doing legs and thighs. I ordered breasts of course (white meat!!). They said that they need another 5 minutes and it will be ready. I said are you sure? Please don’t tell me something just to calm down…tell me the truth. No no, only 5 more minutes. So I sat down at a table and waited…and waited…and waited…

As I am sitting waiting I am watching the cashier and how she is handling the customers. At first I wrote off what I was seeing. But it kept happening again and again. I realized that she was playing favorites. By that I mean…when she would wait on a white person, she always made them wait, she didn’t greet them and after making them wait again, she would finally get them their food. When a Spanish person would come in, she smiled, greeted them in Spanish, and always got them their food. They never ever had to wait. She would make the white people wait in order to make sure she would be able to give it to the Spanish people. I was in shock. I couldn’t believe I was seeing this. I kept thinking I was seeing things. I mean this stuff doesn’t go on anymore. Ok… In my mind it doesn’t, it sure the hell shouldn’t anyway.

After another 20 minutes of waiting I went back up to the counter and told them I wanted a FUCKING manager and I wanted my FUCKING money back, NOW! I mean this was ridiculous. All of a sudden the young drive thru girl came out with my bag of food and apologized. I told her I still needed a manager. She brought out, Marcella. I explained to Marcella, that normally if this had been the first time something had happened, I would have been upset, but I would not have asked for a manager. However, this is the 2nd time this has happened, and while waiting I witnessed something I was uncomfortable with. I told her what happened. I explained to her that there was a breakdown of communication between the team members. I also let her know that just because I am “white” doesn’t mean I don’t understand Spanish. I informed her that the cashier and the workers were speaking negatively in Spanish not only about me but about some of the other customers. I informed her I knew what they were saying and I didn’t appreciate it. I then went on to tell her who said what. I think she was a bit shocked to say the least. Then when I went on to tell her that the cashier was being biased when serving the customers, I could tell she wanted to question it. Before she had a chance there were 2 other customers there that overheard and agreed with me that what I was telling her was the truth.

I felt bad that I was complaining. I know sounds weird huh? I don’t like to do that, but in this case I really felt it was necessary to do it. Marcella then took my name and number and said that she would put my name on “the board” for a free meal. When she said my name would be on the board with the others. I asked others? She said yes. In my mind, all I could think of was, do I even want to know how many other people are on that board? Geesh!!!

Going through the drive-thru isn’t always the quickest way to pick up dinner. That is for damn sure!

Ain't it the truth? (borrowed)

2010-06-05T02:24:00.000-07:00

A very good friend sent this to me and I just had to share it. I thought I would spice it up and add my comments which are in red of course.

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately
clear your computer history if you die. (I thought this was a requirement of BFF's)

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong. (Of course I don't know what that moment feels like!)

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I
was younger. (Was there ever a time I didn't want to nap? I must have been outta my mind!!)

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font. ( I wondered why that wasn't invented)

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? (I ~~ask~~ scream that on a regular basis)

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty
sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood. Or my driveway for that
matter. (I mean at least sometimes I know how to get outta my neighborhood, on the good days anyway)

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how
the person died. (I have said this for years, in fact I always add lib it when I read the obits, sick I know, but it makes it much more interesting!)

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired. (This is an understatement that you will never understand)

10. Bad decisions make good stories. (Have you read any of my blogs?)

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at
work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for
the rest of the day. Time for margaritas!! ( That is why I always made sure I had a fridge in my office)

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I
don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of word and it
asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I
swear I did not make any changes to. (It then causes me to then triple check my paper again, and again.... I am sure you get the idea here.. OCD anyone?)

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this
- ever. (OK so that's what it means to men, but to me, it means either dry clean or get brave and try to hand wash it and pray to God I don't ruin my new favorite piece of clothing)

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?
Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to
voicemail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run
away? (OMG!! How do you know what I do???that is freaking me out!!)

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not
seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste. (Hello...welcome to my world!)

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know
not to answer when they call. (You mean everyone doesn't do this? So does that make it wrong?)

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well. (Duh!! How am I suppose to ~~sneak~~ pick the right flavor of ice cream out!!)

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay. (More kisses, more sex, more.... you get the drift, I am sure)

20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option. (I have even sent in a suggestion about this one...still waiting to hear back from them)

21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger
and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first
saw it. (Hell, sometimes I'll watch a movie a month ago and watch it again and still get that same feeling)

22. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand
than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in. (Ok.. now I am pretty sure someone has been watching me)

23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying
to finish a text. (No way!! No Phone Zone man.. Don't you watch Oprah? She says not to text and drive, and you don't want to upset Oprah!)

24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and
hunger. (Not really..the hunger usually wins)

25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just
nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said? (No comment on this one)

26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team
up to prevent an ass from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers
and sisters! (I am usually the bitch at the front of the line preventing the ass from cutting in. :) and yes I get such joy from this. )

27. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get
dirty, and you can wear them forever. (I heard pants can actually stand on their own!! Not mine of course, they are trained to hang themselves on the appropriate hanger)

28. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every
year? (I don't have any kids, so I can say YES!!)

29. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you
are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far. (I have NEVER done this, but I can't tell you how many times I have seen GUYS do this and then I have to try and not LAUGH at them for doing something so STUPID when they thought they were so COOL)

30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate
drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate
cyclists. (I just want to confirm this has nothing to do with MOTORCYCLISTS, b/c we all know they are AWESOME)

31. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and
still not know what time it is. (I am getting paranoid, who is watching me? #5, #15,#22,#26 & now this one- they are all about me. I guess I am glad there are others out there that do this also... or are you only referring to me?

32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their
car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the
Donkey - but I'd bet my behind everyone can find and push the snooze button
from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.( Nah, I have missed the snooze button on ocassion, when I hit it and pushed the entire clock on the floor. I hate when that happens!)

While at the lab today…

2010-06-04T00:27:00.000-07:00

So there we (me and mom) are sitting in the waiting room minding our own business. There were other people waiting as well. Here comes a mother, with 3, yes I said 3 children. She had a very small boy infant, in a papoose type thingy, and 2 little girls (I will guess and say 2 and 4yrs old). I know I probably shouldn’t say this but they were Spanish and did not speak any English. As we are all waiting to be called for either blood, or x-ray, or whatever, the girls are not quiet. You can tell the older one is the sick one. The middle one is the one that doesn’t listen and totally ignores when mom says NO. She was all over the Fire alarm several times and I don’t know how it did not go off. Thank God it did not. The mom had the oldest little girl drinking lots of water. You could tell her tummy was bothering her. The girls were walking around and all of a sudden the sick one just vomited everywhere. I felt so sorry for her. I mean kids don’t understand why they are getting sick and what is happening to them. Poor thing. Here she is vomiting, crying and her little sister has this horrified look on her face like OMG is stuff going to start spewing out of me now too? I know it shouldn’t have been funny, but the looks on their faces were priceless! Don’t worry I didn’t laugh out loud. But now there was vomit all over the floor, b/c of the sick one and mom is trying to make her come to the trash can to at least be sick over that. The little girl is froze, and the smaller one is just staring and in shock. She looked scared to death. So I hurried up and went into the bathroom to get some paper towels because I knew that people would be slipping on the wet area there. I went to the bathroom, the first one was locked and in use, the second one too. I was thinking, they are never all in use. Finally the last one was open. I grabbed a million paper towels and came out. I handed some to the mom and went to the floor to lay them out over the wet area. All of a sudden a loud and I mean LOUD RINGING ALARM type sound went off. I turned to look at the fire alarm and the little girl was nowhere near it. Then I realized there was a defibrillator right next to me on the wall. I turned and looked and sure enough that sweet little girl (can you hear my sarcasm?) was standing on the chair and had opened it!! A million things were flying through my mind. I swear all of my Spanish went right out of my head. All I could think of was No Bueno (no good) and Muy Mal (very bad). I was horrified that she had done this. At this point mom is in the bathroom with the other 2 children and had just left this one out there. OMG!!! Finally I was able to get the attention of one of the employees to let them know that it was a mistake and that this needed to be turned off. She never even looked my way, but said “yeah a security guard is on his way to turn it off”. I then said we also need clean up over here as well, as someone got sick too. “Oh ok”. When the mother finally returned I was still whirling from all of this and all I could think of to tell her was “Tu mamas no bueno” as I pointed to the defibrillator! I was thinking in my head... “Oh good going, Tam, and to think I speak fluent Spanish? Am I sure about this?” It all went right outta my head in a freaking flash too!! I was irritated at myself that I couldn’t “find” my Spanish words at all. Then again, I have a hard enough time finding my everyday English words so what the hell was I expecting!

So what do you do when you are waiting at your lab??

Why you should wear a helmet, even if you are a doctor

2010-06-03T00:26:00.000-07:00

We were talking to my mom’s primary care doctor today. He is a very nice “young” doctor. By young I mean by age and by experience. It has taken him some time to get used to my smart ass comments but he is coming around. So today during our visit for some reason he decided to tell us a story. Oh wait, we were discussing my mom’s Coumadin levels and activities that she should and shouldn’t do.

He went on to tell us how the other day he was riding his nephew’s scooter. He always thought it was a really easy thing to do. He never really saw a reason as to why a helmet would be needed. Can I just remind you that we are talking about a grown adult man who happens to be a M.D. So there he was riding the scooter, being all cool (these are his words too funny, I know) and all of a sudden he realized he was a bit close to the wall, so he put his hand out and before he knew it he was on the ground. Luckily he broke his fall with his leg and scraped his knee up pretty badly. He also hit his head on a sprinkler! After that happened, that is when he realized, boys and girls, that why a helmet is necessary, even for scooters!

He said he was lucky that he broke his fall with his leg and not his head; otherwise he would have ended up in the ER and then wouldn’t have been able to keep our appointment. As I was laughing I asked him and I would love to know what you would have told the ER what happened as to how you ended up in the ER with your head cracked open! He smiled and said, thank goodness, I landed on my leg first and just slightly hit my head!

He went out and bought himself a helmet now so when he does ride his nephew’s scooter he will be protected, I mean just in case, you never know.

Memorial Day Tribute. . .

2010-05-30T23:58:00.000-07:00

Forget - Me - Not

Forget-me-not

When you're lost in thought

As you make it through your day

Forget-me-not

I am one who fought

And was scarred along the way

Forget-me-not

For the freedom bought

With the lives one can't repay

Forget-me-not

When your child is taught

To remember yesterday

Forget-me-not

When the day is hot

And you bend your knees to pray

Forget-me-not

Yes, I heard the shot

But I did not run away

Forget-me-not

I'm a patriot

And I need your help today

I just don’t get it…

2010-05-30T02:31:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking about these things for awhile now and no I don’t just mean the last hour or so. I realize there are a ~~few several~~ many things that I just don’t understand. Here are some of them…

I just don’t get it…

• How people don’t follow through. Please if you tell me you are doing to do something, just do it. I mean how can you live with yourself never following through on anything, big or small?

• If you have animals take care of them. Now this one comes in 3 parts. Anyone that knows me knows I am an ANIMAL LOVER. So if you have animals you better be able to afford to feed them, bathe them, house them, and take them to the doctor. When I say that I mean, they need their shots, they need to be checked out and kept up, you know to be healthy. I would love to have a million animals, but let’s face it, it isn’t realistic for me, financially or physically, so I have limited myself 2. I know I can always care for them in any capacity that is needed. (Trust me I am not even going to get started on abuse here, because that is one worth an entire entry!)

• Still on the animal thing. When I see a sign that says, “PLEASE HELP ME FIND A HOME FOR SMOKEY, WE AREMOVING AND CANNOT TAKE HIM WITH US”. Seriously? My next question is are they leaving the kids and spouse behind too? Because let me tell me you, it would be a COLD FUCKING DAY in hell that I would give up my animals because I was moving. Granted there are certain situations that no one can avoid, but it surely doesn’t happen as often as I see these signs around.

• Another animal issue… How can people have animals (Dogs) and let them bark continuously and be home and never try to get them to stop barking? OMG!! I know I can’t be the only one in the neighborhood that this drives up a freaking wall. Am I the only one that can hear this? UGH! Oh yeah, and they leave their dogs out 24/7!! Are you fucking kidding me? I don’t care if they are small or large, I just don’t get it. Especially where I live, owls, coyotes, cougars are regulars in my neighborhood and have been known to take them right out of their yards.

• How people can just not give it any thought or much thought at all and just put a family member into a nursing home. I have cared for 2 family members who passed away and I am currently caring for my mom (who will be getting better soon) and couldn’t imagine it any other way. I would do that for whomever I could.

• Why they charge so damn much for toilet paper. I mean seriously, we are going to throw the damn stuff away anyway. UGH

• How is it that ~~you~~ I can feel great one minute and the next ~~you~~ I suddenly feel like death warmed over? I would love to know how a person’s body, ok mine, can go from zero to shit in under a second.

• Why is it breezy outside and for some reason I can’t seem to get the breeze inside my house?

• Before I start on this... I LOVE CHILDREN. I do, I really do. But I don’t understand why they always seem to play in front of my house. I don’t have children. It doesn’t’ matter what their age is but they always seem to be in front of my house. The screaming, the yelling, the bouncing balls. Sometimes it is just TOO MUCH.

• How my little dog, Tee-Tee is so in tune to me. I have had other animals, but she takes the cake. She is so in tune, she seems to always know when I am sad, hurting, angry, excited. She knows almost before it happens.

• Why people don’t smile. It doesn’t hurt. If you have a smile on your face you feel better. It is much more pleasant to come across someone with a smile. Hardly anyone does that anymore. I would love to see more of that.

• This one tops it all. I don’t get why people who read my blog don’t comment. I know I have people that read my blog. Although you would never know it because no one “FOLLOWS” the blog. God forbid for anyone to “COMMENT” on the blog. Trust me peoples it doesn’t hurt, in fact it makes me feel freaking fantastic. So if you could please “FOLLOW” and or “COMMENT”, I would LOVE you all so much more than what I already do.

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY (well almost)

2010-05-26T02:21:00.000-07:00

They say a picture is worth a thousand words...

Well sometimes all it takes is a picture to make your day. The last few days have been a bit rough for me. My cousin, Adrianne's daughter just had her 2nd Bday and they live on the east coast. So mom and I sent a little something for her bday. The other day I turned on my phone and had this picture waiting for me with a note saying "she loves it". I tell you no matter how icky of a day or week I was having this made it 100 times better. Too adorable for words if you ask me.

Payton

Dear God

2010-05-25T02:13:00.000-07:00

Dear God,

I am sorry to bother you but I was recently told that we can actually ask for specific things. I hope this is true. I had no idea. If this is not true, then you will have to take this up with my therapist, because I am pretty sure she has been telling more people than just me. So here goes.

First of all I am not really asking for anything in particular at least I don’t think so. I am asking for an easy day. Do you know what that means? Let me explain that to you so that there are no misconceptions. I would hate for that to happen.

I just want one day (24 hours to be exact) to be easy. No hassles, no problems, no issues, no situations. Gosh, just the thought about that makes me giddy. I don’t think I have ever in my entire life had an entire day that was “easy”. I would love to be able to experience 1 day (24 hours) of that.

“A Sample Easy Day”

Get up in the morning, feed the animals have them eat whatever it is I give them without them acting like spoiled brats like their grandma made them into. Give them their medicine without having to use the Jaws of Life to open Chip’s mouth to get his 3 syringes of meds in and as for Tee-Tee it would be nice if she wouldn’t be so darn nervous. Go check on mom (well this is only while she is sick, when she is not, she is always the first person up), check the litter boxes and have no messes. You see Chip has this habit of perching on the edge of his litter box so sometimes it ~~tilts~~ flips over so you can imagine what kind of fun filled mess that makes. That is always nice to wake up to first thing in the morning. Once I am up, I need to help mom with checking her blood sugar level (so if you could make sure there are no errors on the machine and we get enough blood with the first prick), doing a breathing treatment (just let everything hook up easily), and giving her the IV push medicine that is needed (let the IV still be good and not blown so we can use it and not have to make a trip to the infusion clinic). Depending on what time I am done with this, I will either figure out something for breakfast or lunch aka brunch. I will make us something to eat (so if you could make sure this goes smoothly, with no burning or dropping or anything like that) and then clean up (if this could go smoothly as well, no dropping things or making a mess). While I am making beds (it would be nice not to trip over myself, I can’t tell you how often I do that these days (I never used to, well that was before all of this LUPUS stuff)), and cleaning or doing laundry (being able to remember what I was doing would be nice and not forgetting to put something in the laundry would be great too). If I have to get moms oxygen ready for a trip out, your help is GREATLY appreciated. I mean it seems that lately it just does not want to cooperate no matter what I do. I mean it is a simple thing; you attach the regulator to the oxygen tank. However it doesn’t seem to want to go that smoothly anymore. I have to work and work and work with it. Can I tell you that it really tries my nerves? I mean I know you are busy and all, but you have had to hear my crying and begging you for some assistance. It is imperative that mom has oxygen and that it works, so this isn’t something I can just not worry about and forget about it and not deal with it. I can put it off to the side and try again later which is what I have found myself doing several times over the last several days. It keeps leaking. SO PLEASE CAN YOU HELP ME OUT HERE???? Can you make it so that the oxygen tanks just attach to the regulator with no issues? Ok... that is a specific request. So out of this whole letter, so far I have one specific one. I mean I could have started out with, when I wake up could you make sure that I feel refreshed and have energy and don’t hurt all over. BUT I didn’t do that. I know that is specific…but the way I look at this is I have this for a reason and although I may not know what that reason is I will eventually.

Anyway, I am a firm believer that GOD (that would be you) doesn’t give you more than you can handle. Although as we both know there have been a few times when you have waited till I was on my knees till you lifted me up. I get that, I really really do. However, I thought that maybe if I sent you a letter it might make more of an impression on you and let you know that I could really use some assistance right about now. Know what I mean?

So am I asking for too much? Let’s review…

I am not asking to be “healed” although let’s face it if you wanted to throw that my way, I sure the hell wouldn’t decline it. (Yes, I just cursed in my letter to GOD, b/c he knows me and he gets me, we are cool that way). If you want to heal mom now that I would be willing to discuss, because let me remind you, I would gladly give up an arm/leg if that was at all possible, but we had already discussed that, so unless things have changed, I know what the answer is already.

I just want to have a day without an upsets, or catastrophes or hassles. Is that so much to ask? I don’t even expect or want this on a daily basis just once would be nice; however, if you want to do it more often for me, you know I will gladly accept it.

Sorry it has been so long since I have written. I promise I will write more often.

Love,

Tammy

PS. If you need the name of the therapist that told me you take specific requests let me know, I just assumed you would know who it was.

Paging Nurse Tammy...

2010-05-20T03:51:00.000-07:00

My mom was diagnosed with cellulitis awhile back and before that she suffered a pulmonary embolism . They have tried her on a few different types of antibiotics but she was not able to stay on them. On May 11th she had an appointment with her pulmonary doctor and he is very concerned about her legs. They do NOT look well at all. So he wanted to start her back on antibiotics. We had to come back the following day so she could get set up. Oh... I forgot to mention, she will be set up with an IV and I will have to administer the IV push antibiotic twice a day.

Truthfully, this does not bother me at all. I don’t mind it and this kind of stuff is pretty easy for me. The nurse put in her IV and gave her the first dose of the medication (Ancef). Then it was up to me to continue this twice a day (every 12 hours). We were given the medication, the alcohol swabs, the tape, and the saline and extra “socks”.

The Saline syringes, the Ancef syringe and alchohol pads

I ask them how long the IV should last and they tell me only 3 days! Excuse me?? I was like, then show me how to do this, so that I can do this, because I can’t keep bringing her down here every 3 days. Then they said well, in the hospital they always change the IV’s every 3 days. I giggled out loud. I can’t tell you the last time my mom was in the hospital and they followed that “rule of thumb”. Oh puhlease! We decided it could stay in as long as it was good. Meaning not leaking, not hurting, still able to push the meds in, blah, blah, blah.

Daily at 11am/11pm I put on my little nurse hat and gloves and give her, her medication. She lays in bed (I know she has it really rough!) and I sit on the bed next to her (again, really rough) and I take care of business. I undress it, clean it, do saline, clean, medication (which has to be spread out over 10 min or she may get sick), clean and then another saline. I cover it back up and then put the “sock” over it. It is like gauze but it just slides over the arm as to cover the area without having to use any ~~staples~~ tape.

Mom's arm with the "sock", getting ready for the IV push.

Mom's arm without the "sock" and I am getting ready to "drug" her up! LOL

One of the parts of the treatment is that she is supposed to stay off of her feet. She is supposed to be in bed with her legs elevated. ELEVATED. The key word here is ELEVATED. For some unknown reason this last week she has NOT been doing that. Talk about being a BAD patient, she would have won the award. OMG, I told her she was going to be the death of me.

We had another doctor appointment today and her legs look worse. Yup you heard me. WORSE. The swelling has not gone down, there is still redness and there are more blisters. HELLO??? Does she not see this?? I mean if she doesn’t take care of this she could lose her fucking leg!!! I don’t know how else to get this through to her. I have shown her ~~scary~~ gross pictures. I have had doctors and nurses talk to her. I have done research and read it to her. UGH!! PARENTS!! When the doctor saw her leg, let’s just say he was a bit more concerned. In the middle of the appointment he excused himself to make a phone call. That worried mom. I said to her, maybe he is checking if they have room in the hospital for you. She HATES the hospital. That is her biggest fear to go back in to the hospital. I keep telling her it must not be if you won’t stay off of your feet!!!! Any way he checked with the infectious doctors and consulted with them and they will be calling us tomorrow so that we can get in to see them. OMG!! Really?? Trust me I am NOT going to say what next. I know better than to do that. Hell I don’t have to, it just keeps coming anyway, without an invitation of any kind!

While we were there since the IV line had been in for a week, we had a new one put in. So that way we could continue with the antibiotics. He did mention some other “possible” things that it could be…so needless to say I have been researching tonight. I just want/wish/hope/pray that one of the doctors can figure this out and get her on the road to recovery. He had also mentioned that it could just be from the blood clot. You see the original blood clot was in her leg (from her knee surgery) it broke up and parts of it went to her lung. However, my question to that is then why are both of her legs like this? Wouldn’t only one leg be like this?

After the appointments today she was pretty tired. Once we got home and I got her fed and got her into bed she pretty much slept the afternoon/evening away. This is exactly what she needs to do. Stay off of her legs with them elevated and get better, damn it!

Side note: As if there hasn’t been enough stuff going on, the other morning she “kinda” fell out of bed and got stuck between her bed and nightstand! I had to come and help her. Talk about sore and bruised. It looks like someone beat the crapola outta her.

Nurse Tammy needs to get to bed because she just realized how late it is and her morning shift will be starting in no time!

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY (well almost)

2010-05-19T00:01:00.000-07:00

Tee-Tee is afraid of the camera. Truth be told she is afraid of most anything, but don't tell her that, it will just make her more nervous and upset! I love to dress her up but taking the pictures is the difficult part with her. As you can see she was simply exhausted from all of modeling that I was "making" her do for this photo shoot! Since most of my Wordless Wednesday's seem to be about Chip I thought I would do one of his sister, Tee-Tee.

Tee-Tee barely able to keep her eyes open while I do her photo shoot. Her "hat" was a top from a new treat that Chip just got. Her new treat did not have a decorative adornment like that.

As you see, I am a slave driver and she is exhausted. Can you see the sweat running down her face? LOL

Here she was still able to have her eyes open but for how much longer we weren't sure.

She is done. I think you might be able to see it in her eyes, begging me to stop with the bright lights and flashy thing. In case you didn't know that is really scary!

Poor Mother Hubbard

2010-05-17T01:39:00.000-07:00

Soooo my cupboards are bare... I’m talking like Poor Mother Hubbard is looking rich compared to my cupboards here. I hate that. I hate being out of EVERYTHING. I LOVE when my cupboards and refrigerators and freezers are full. There is just something about that that makes me feel so good inside. I feel FULL, but prepared also. I know it sounds weird, but then again, I never claimed to not sound weird. On a side note I had an old boss tell me that he thought I must have had a previous life during the depression because I always liked to be stocked. One of my duties at that place was to make sure we always had enough of all of our herbs and meds. I always had enough and then a little extra because you just never know. He always teased me about that. OK back to the story.

I have needed to go grocery shopping for what seems like eternity. Mom is home and I am unable to leave her alone. I hadn’t been able to find anyone to stay with her so I could run to the store and at least pick up a few things. So I did it… yup… I finally did it… I went online and checked out grocery shopping online.

I normally shop at Ralphs or Albertsons. However, after checking it all out, I decided to go with Vons. I felt like it took me all me night to “shop” online. I am sure it didn’t but it sure the hell felt like it. I do know that it took me a bit longer then if I had actually gone into the store, but I figured it was my first time. I mean I would like to think that every Vons Virgin takes a little longer the first time. Right? I am hoping that if I do this again, I will be like an old pro.

I was pleased with myself at how well I handled the situation, because if you remember, I hate online shopping. (Insert link to my blog of Online Ordering is my personal Hell, which is what I was going to do, but for some unknown reason I couldn't get the damn link to work for nothing in this world. So after trying a million and one times and realizing the time I knew I had to give in to defeat (YUCK) and move on to get this blog posted this month!!) The ordering was pretty easy, they had it set up pretty well. I set it up so that the groceries would be delivered today between 1-3pm.

At 1:30 pm Vons arrived.

What a great site that was to see… the Vons truck. If anyone would have ever told me that I would get excited over seeing a Vons truck I would have laughed. It made me feel giddy inside. You know what the best part was? He unloaded and carried all of the groceries into the house! Did you hear that? At first I felt so weird almost guilty. I said almost guilty…but the giddiness and happiness took over and I was elated. That part alone made it SO much easier on me, I don’t know if anyone out there has any idea how wonderful that was. I am getting giddy over it now just talking about it. Happiness took over and I was elated. That part alone made it SO much easier on me, I don’t know if anyone out there has any idea how wonderful that was. I am getting giddy over it now just talking about it!!

So all I had to do was put away all of the groceries. Granted there were a lot, but in a sense it felt like there was hardly anything because all I had to do was put them away. I didn’t have to drive to the store, go shopping, load the vehicle, unload the vehicle, bring them into the house and then put them away. I only had to do 1 out of 6 of those tasks.

Basically they did a pretty good job. There were only a few things that were off. I wanted only ½ lb of the deli meat and instead I got a full pound and it was sliced the way I had requested. There were 2 things on my list that they were out of stock on. And the weirdest thing yet, I received 1 banana. Yup, that’s right 1 banana. I had asked for 3 small slightly green bananas, and instead I received 1 HUGE banana. It cracks me up every time I look at it sitting on the counter. I wonder why they think I wanted only 1 banana. LOL

All in all it was a GREAT experience. Did I say I was giddy over having groceries delivered? I could never have imagined that grocery delivery could have made me so ~~excited~~ elated.

Help. . .no thanks I'll just do it myself.

2010-05-16T04:36:00.000-07:00

Asking for help is probably the hardest thing for me to do. I am pretty sure I would rather go to the OB/GYN or the dentist then to have to ask for help. I think it has something to do with the way I was raised. We always just took care of things ourselves, ya know? I mean there is nothing wrong with asking for help; in fact I think it is great if you can do it, it is just not one of my stronger points.

I am one of those people that if I know someone who may need something and I know what it is; I will either just do it or get it for them. I am not the type to say, “If you need anything let me know” or “If there is anything I can do let me know” and leave it at that. I will tell them that just to let them know I am here, but at the same time if I know what it is that I can do, I will do my best to just do it. Is that wrong? I don’t think so. Course then again, that is just my opinion.

I am used to just taking care of things myself. I have done it most of my life and probably will continue to do so. Sometimes it is just easier that way. I don’t like to have to count /depend on anyone or feel indebted to anyone like I “owe” them. It is hard enough to have to ask for help and then afterwards have to hear how “I owe them”. No thank you! I will handle it on my own, and pay for it later, I guess! Pay for it later, I mean sometimes with my health and all, it takes more energy then I have, so I end up hurting or having no energy for too many days. I just have to deal with it though.

One of my Doctors has been trying to convince me that I need to learn how to ask for help. I mean it is a good thought and all and I get what she means, but it is a lot harder than what it sounds. She told me that I need to let people in and give them a chance to help me. I can’t expect everyone to “help” or offer help the way I would/do. I explained to her that I was well aware of that, because most people just don’t do that! The way I look at it is if my close family/friends don’t know how I am by now, they never will. Sometimes when you ask for help it ends up being more work than it is worth, know what I mean?

Here are some examples and these are just fairly recent ones:

• Awhile back I needed a ride to/from a doctor appointment. I asked a friend and she had said it was no problem at all. However every day the week before she called to ask what time it was that she had to take me to the appointment. Then she still came late and it was like she had to fit me into her schedule. When originally it was her day off and she had nothing planned. Now it was like she had all of these other things she had to do and I was lucky that she was able to help me out. (A great example of why I don’t ask for help)

• My mom has been rather sick and cannot be left alone. Yet there never seems to be anyone around that can hang out with her for a couple of hours at a time so that I can go grocery shopping or to one of my doctor appointments. I am not asking for someone to stay with her for 8 hours. I am not asking for someone to do a lot for her. They basically need to be here, in case she needs anything (I would already have snacks, etc ready) and to make sure she does not get up and walk or sit with legs hanging down. Even though when this all first happened it would be no problem at all, now they are all nowhere to be found.

• The most recent incident is that I have a doctor appointment coming up that is actually about an hour away. So NOT looking forward to this appointment. I know that with my current condition I would not be OK to drive there, have the 3 hour appointment and then drive home. So I needed someone to drive me. I actually did what my doctor said. I took a deep breath (almost forgot to let it out and take another one) sucked it up and asked someone for help. It was the hardest thing ever. Yup, you guessed it… was told NO. That is the last time I will be asking for help. (Another great example of why I don’t ask for help)

• Or if you need something from the store and they offer to go. You give them the list and the money. Not only do they not get what you asked for but they bought stuff at such an expensive price you are wondering what were they thinking?? You know they wouldn't have spent that kind of money on that, and you know they know you wouldn't have either, especially since you wrote it on the note. So sometimes it is just better to do it yourself.

Please, please, please don't think that I am not appreciative, because I am, but like I said, sometimes it is just easier to do it yourself. I just think that if someone doesn't really want to help, don't even offer.

Then on the other hand, we have a very dear friend of my father's who still looks in on us. He helps without asking. He will take out our trash cans or bring them. He doesn't do it every week, but if he knows I have been having a rough week, he seems to always make sure they are taken care of. • Awhile back I needed a ride to/from a doctor appointment. I asked a friend and she had said it was no problem at all. However every day the week before she called to ask what time it was that she had to take me to the appointment. Then she still came late and it was like she had to fit me into her schedule. When originally it was her day off and she had nothing planned. Now it was like she had all of these other things she had to do and I was lucky that she was able to help me out. (A great example of why I don’t ask for help)Asking for help is really difficult for me, and it seems that when I finally do it doesn’t really work out for me. I am sure you can see why I feel the way I do and why I basically feel it is just better to do it myself. So most of the time, I figure it out so that I can do it by myself and not have to bother anyone else, but on those rare occasions that someone does come through, it is so nice and such a pleasant surprise.

I hope this makes you think twice about helping someone out and not just "offering".

• My mom has been rather sick and cannot be left alone. Yet there never seems to be anyone around that can hang out with her for a couple of hours at a time so that I can go grocery shopping or to one of my doctor appointments. I am not asking for someone to stay with her for 8 hours. I am not asking for someone to do a lot for her. They basically need to be here, in case she needs anything (I would already have snacks, etc ready) and to make sure she does not get up and walk or sit with legs hanging down. Even though when this all first happened it would be no problem at all, now they are all nowhere to be found.

• The most recent incident is that I have a doctor appointment coming up that is actually about an hour away. So NOT looking forward to this appointment. I know that with my current condition I would not be ok to drive there, have the 3 hour appointment and then drive home. So I needed someone to drive me. I actually did what my doctor said. I took a deep breath (almost forgot to let it out and take another one) sucked it up and asked someone for help. It was the hardest thing ever. Yup, you guessed it… was told NO. That is the last time I will be asking for help. (Another great example of why I don’t ask for help)

• Or if you need something from the store. They offer to go. You give them the list and the money. Not only do they not get what you asked for but they bought stuff at such an expensive price you are wondering what were they thinking?? You know they wouldn't have spent that kind of money on that, and you know they know you wouldn't have either, especially since you wrote it on the note and all. So sometimes it is just better to do it yourself.

On the other hand we have a very dear friend of my father's who still looks in on us. He will take the trash cans in /out. Not every week, but if he knows I am having a rough week, he always seems to make sure they are taken care of. He will pull out the weeds, or spray bug spray or bring our newspaper and put it on the porch. He calls to check on us just to see how "the girls" are doing. It is the little things like that, that are nice. He doesn't have to, but he does. He always offers and always does. He done errands for us and thought nothing of it and never made us feel like we "owed" him anything. That is nice. See in my mind if you know someone that is in need of something, be it a material object, or a service and you can actually provide it, then why not just do it? I mean wouldn’t you want or hope that it would be returned to you someday? I guess that is just me. I think nothing of those types of things, even when I am “overextended” myself. I have given people rides to work b/c there car has “died” and thought nothing of it. I have gone with people or taken them to doctor appointments so that they wouldn’t have to go by themselves drive themselves. I will check in on people’s animals without them asking me to if I know that is something they would appreciate.

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY

2010-05-12T01:18:00.000-07:00

My handsome baby boy,Chip laying on a pile of papers and in/on my purse. I think he was looking for some of those yummy treats that Daisy is always talking about. She was so nice to tell us where to order the tasty treats from that now he can't wait till they get here!

Happy Mother's Day!!

2010-05-09T00:28:00.000-07:00

Mother's day is just not Mothers. It is also for the ones who are Aunts, Grandma's, Nana's, Foster Mom's, Mentors, Godmother,sisters or someone who you can look up to and consider someone like a mom. You don't have to have only had a 2 legged child be a Mom. You may have furry children, you may be a caregiver, it is all the same...it is the mothering instinct. Mom was raised by her mom basically without a father, and on father's day she used to always give her a Father's Day card, b/c in her mind she was not only her mother but also her father. She did both roles. So today I also look to the Father's that play the role of the mother as well as the Father. Happy Mother's Day to you.

I hope everyone's day is blessed with love and laughter!

Hope you enjoy the poem!

A Mother's love is something

that no on can explain,

It is made of deep devotion

and of sacrifice and pain,

It is endless and unselfish

and enduring come what may

For nothing can destroy it

or take that love away . . .

It is patient and forgiving

when all others are forsaking,

And it never fails or falters

even though the heart is breaking . . .

It believes beyond believing

when the world around condemns,

And it glows with all the beauty

of the rarest, brightest gems . . .

It is far beyond defining,

it defies all explanation,

And it still remains a secret

like the mysteries of creation . . .

A many splendoured miracle

man cannot understand

And another wondrous evidence

of God's tender guiding hand.

~Helen Steiner Rice~

Me~Nana~Mom (3 generations)

The best mom and Nana around!!